dream dream dream

aight, i had fun last night..but i had trouble waking up..stupid fun!



had a weird-nice dream though. the setting was at lamot II, calauan, laguna. [gramm's place]. the house was funny..t'was mixed with gramms hauz, cdss school and house...

there's a part of the weird house with gramm's part of her house, and there, was gramms, gramps[who's long way dead already] and tita beth. they were treating gramps cuz he was sick, he was acting like a kid and i was helping them treat him by scraping a paper?! to remove like the whatever thingy that's keeping gramps sick.. geee..


then i went out and it was at gramms frontyard which was supposedly to be the backyard. and there, our 5/1 guys came out and were playing soccer or basketball..the nice part was they were all muscular..though i only recognised neo wei and shahir..lol..i played with them for awhile..


then i ran into the back and i entered Big Brother's house..and there i saw the PBB season1 housemates but i only recognised cassandra and franzen..geee..then i forgot the rest liao! spoiler..kla, bubye!

brit's havin a breakdown!

Britney's Having A Breakdown! Episode 1



britney..my idol when she first came out. she threw away her beautiful image..i still love her though! wakaka..

syafie

syafie

i miss this guy. i miss the stupidity he did. i miss his innocence in some things. i remembered him using fork and knife to eat the cake, i remembered him asked what BJ meant [baby J la!]. i remembered him asking for advices about a girl.

you deserve whereever you may be right now. you deserve success in life because you have a great determination. you may be hating some of us, or me. you may have forgotten us, or me. but i still respect you as a person. i miss you..my friend...and i sincerely hope you've moved on.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to my late grappa, Benito. i love you lolo. march 21st [i'm actually smelling cigarette smell in my room and mom's not smellin anything, no smell in the corridor either...Hi lolo! ur in my room! ur visitin me..i'm not scared..i love u!]

i'm getting a lil nervously-excited about some things i don't even know exactly what and why. maybe it's my new school, maybe it's my new cousin-housemate, maybe the new things to learn, maybe my saying goodbye to my everyday life of entertainment, maybe saying goodbye to my slacking attitude?! lol..im still slacking so minus that out..

im always havin a hard time sleeping every night. even when im so effin sleepy already i still can't sleep. i'm always thinkin of things even if i duwanna..haiz..im insomniac alredi..gaahhh...

anyway, i miss everyone that's been parta my life. [one of the things i think about that's why i can't sleep! stuupid distractors!] ahakz..

i just miss you people. here i am putting on weight everyday, hoping to be as fat as siti fairuz..or even fatter[whoops]..love it..

bye kuya!

Yesterday was tiring, another dinner party..like evri two weeks..dad got a lil tipsy

Anyway, bye bye! kuya's left for taiwan already for training for a month..yey! confirm he wun bring me back with a thing! eu stewpig mustard! but i know he will...he better! U better!

And tew bad, ima be left here with a babysitter..teenysitter..oh well, wuteverr..and after mom and dad comes back from the Holy Week trip, ima be buzy yow! i'll be working as a tour guide prolly FOC...cousin Ritchell, Meg, Fons, aunt Teresa and unc Art..phew...

PS: sorry Gid i cant go, cuz mah momma asked me to go immigration with her. turned out im an illegal alien and i'll be deported back to Jupiter! ok..ur lame..no.not me,..YOU! yeah you..as for wed, i MIGHT go

welcome home baby TAZ

image by joanne '

[a new housemate/playmate/family [many went missing, so they aren't in the picture]

I’d like to welcome my BABY TAZ! He has finally come home..after I’ve no idea when.
I got him only today, but he was officially "born" on 18 Jan 2007 at between 1300-1330h.
what a big baby for a 2month old Baby Taz.

He is a gift from my dear friend, Thiruchelvam s/o "something" [sorry i forgot]. Actually, being me, I FORCED my friends to buy this for me. So far Thiru was the one who did; supposedly on the Prom night but nevermoind. I'm still getting one from my someone. haha..i'm such a greedy bitch..oh well, I guess i'm too pampered by my family and friends. my gawsh.

poly

Okaye! So yesterday accompanied mom to see a doc after receiving her test results. Didn’t have much time to get ready cuz she was fast.. [Ewww I felt like I wasn’t clean!] Well of course I took a bath but after that I didn’t have time to do my rituals! [No! not pass motion..but rituals as in dressing up! My gawsh..]

We reached the polyclinic and was gonna take a number when the receptionist told us that they’ve temporarily closed the thingy cuz of the overwhelming patients who was seeing a doc. [Too many sick people la!] She told us to come back at 1315h but mom thought it would be long if we did so went to KFC to take our breakfast. She said she duwanna eat fattening foods but she ordered a burger meal [like hello?! Mom?] and I was craving for plain fries so I ordered that. [well I wanted salad as well but mom said duwan!] but when we started eating, she asked me to buy the salad [maaaawwwm!] I told her that she should be eating salads instead of burger but she said it wasn’t enuff for her.[eye roll] She was on the phone with her nurse friend, Christine and told mom to go back see a doc cuz her results were bad. [Of course I gave the face la! Must go back..wahlau..]

Ok so we were back, took a number, sat and waited. After an hour she got called. [I was patient to wait..infairness..knowing that I‘m an impatient bitch] Then another number to wait for. [I thought it’d be better than last time..like half an hour at least.] Then an hour passed..[and I was like, ok never mind we‘ll be called soon]. Then 10 mins passed I was already impatient. Half an hour later, verry impatient. I was lookin around for the others who were waiting, and everytime a number was called, the patients going in were shaking their heads while others frowned [I was onna them]. Chicken..2hours ready still dun have sia. The others were already knockin the door, going in and askin’ the docs when they’d be called then they’d go back to their seat. 2h30fuckingminutes later, mom’s name was called to let er know that she’d be seeing another doc [stuuupid]! okaye then she was called [finally!] doc tol’ er..ahh never mind! Five mins later, we were waiting for mom’s medcines and we were off for groceries.

Gawsshhh! Waited 3h30mins just to see a doc for 5 mins! wadafuck! K then while mom was at the NTUC, I was buying shushis and fishballs for me! [It’s a treat I deserve!] t’was raining so took a cab home. Mom was worried cuz the fishes haven’t eaten. After that I washed the stuuupit dishes I left last night..[yess, last night! Tired like what siaaa…] I then took the clothes I shopped for last week, 2weeks ago and 3weeks ago to wash..it’s been stashed under my bed for weeks. [*shakes head* some things just dun change..procrastinator]..oh and my luggage..still have things there..still on the floor waiting for me to clear them..my table too..messy as ever..clothes everywhere in my room..

I just love being messy..but I’m a CLEAN person nevertheless…just a MESSY person that’s all..big diff okaye!

anniv

happy 23rd anniversary!

you duwanna show me ur date pics..nahh..i show this!

why aren't you smilin Dadoodz?!

one of the "father-daughter bonding day".. ouh dad..ur so fat! u see..mom followed ur footsteps! and now it's my turn! gosh!

dance!

i feel happy! so i dance to this number!
"sige, i-kembot..."

ite

Hi people! I got my first choice; Information Technology at ITE Dover. Congrats to me! Thank you…
Ouh and Sab, see you in school/class…haha..haiyer! U aGaiiin! Well, at least I’ll have a companion…

You know uh! Actually uh..I haven’t received the stupit email leh! Sab smsed me then I ganchiong [correct anot uh?] go online then check my email…dunnav siaaaa…And then hor..I go check under JAE site to check results..waaaahh…have leehhhh..budden hor..how come email no have yet? Haiyuh..so lousy…

Okaye…wutevuurr… Anyways, congrats to the people who’ve received their results and got their first choice. And TOOOOOO bad for the rest who got dumped at courses they don’t really like..haha..Take it as a challenge guys! Show ‘em that even if you didn’t go where you wanted to, you’ll succeed in the future. But it all depends on how you handle your attitude towards your goal. All of us have goals but even if we go to the longer path unlike the others, in the end what matters is you will do all you can to make it to the end. You all don’t play play anymore uh! Don’t sleep in class uh! Don’t become minah/mat/ahbeng/ahlian… what’s gangster in tamil uh?!

5/1, I hope we are still a family no matter where we go. I know for now we all love 5/1 but in the future you’ll have more families just don’t forget 5/1 ok? Don’t be snobbish uh!

Kk…godai….

vored!

Borinnng! My day was so the effing dull I was just waiting for it to end! Bren came and watched a Leo’s movie. Didn’t watched it with them cuz I was really just not in the mood. I’m so evil already I haven’t been attending mass again for two/three consecutive weeks..and it’s Lenten season. Haiyuh! Why am I like this uh! That’s what holidays do to you! But if I wasn’t here I would be always out partying! It’s just sooo boring here..Gosh..take me home mann…everybody’s so busy and I’ve really got nothing much to do unlike when I just came back. Now everything’s just sooo..I don’t know! I just hate the feeling

tour me

I was late yesterday..as usual..initially planned to meet my tour guides at 1130 at jurong east interchange[wee I rid the LRT and MRT!], budden the tourist[me] asked for 1300. And then extended to 1330 budden I think I came at around 1430. Gosh..this kind of person how to go out with uh! But luckily they were patient enough to know me…stuuupit! On the way, my tour guides still hadn’t decided on where to take me until she said vivocity. Then I was like, “ok”… cuz I really dunno the place..[riiight]

[before]
The night before, I told myself, no…I won’t be late! So I alarmed my phone to 7am. Woke up, did the things I had to do..I JUUUUUST dunno why I still came late! Tsk..I’m really doing my best to be punctual but it just doesn’t cooperate with my whatever…

Anyways..okaye..long story short, I had fun with you guys. Only thing was thiru’s sis was such a spoiler…lol…and yeah..ros and I stood at the CCK station for 1+hour just to chat. We were at the same spot. Faziana went to eat at lot1 and when she was going home, she found us still at the same spot…okaye whatever!

Mmm…today, I’m officially a month old in Singapore. I hired another tour guide, dadoodz. He brought me to this place called downtown east for chalet but I didn’t stay with them cuz they were guys…drink2...den.. eeeewwww I just don’t like dadoodz when he’s drunk…I was in the room while they were preparing the BBQ..[ouh, and we came late as usual]. I played xbox while eating. Then dad called me to join them. I was engrossed with the game and he kept callin so I got irritated and got out until only after I’ve shut the door did I remember to take the stuuupit card! I went down and told em.. Mah fun sia me… make people do work! They went to call the staff to open the door. [this is what happens when ur really forgetful] but I didn’t care la. Once people do something about your problem you tend to not care anymore cuz it’s being solved for you..haha..nooo actually it’s just my attitude of being a “heck-care” person. Then kuya and bren came then blahblahblah…..

I’m too lazy to tell my day…but whatever..

getting to knoooow euuuu

I’m going out to unwind after being stuck at home for days thinking about so many random things. Like sex, sex and..sex. Ouh it was great..

Okaye that was eeewy..STOPPIT Joanne! I’m gonna go get to know sunny-cloudy island Singapore! I’ve been here for almost a month now. Exactly a month tomorrow! It’s nice, it’s fulla buildings, it’s clean, it’s no more green, it’s boring! You see the same old things wherever you go! Hahaha..no, I love Singapore. I grew up here more than in the phils. I remember telling a friend that I was going back home and she said “what home? This is your home”. it’s funny how people are different. There are racists who’ll make fun of your country while there are people who love you wherever you come from. It’s just really nice to have friends treat you like a local though they know you aren’t. thank you friend.. U suck la.. I love you.

Okaye, the sun’s out! Finally that stoopit cloud’s gotten outta the sun’s way! I’mma go tour sunny sunny island Singapore!

But I still sleepy lah! Okaye okaye I don’t wanna be late anymore..haiz..but I think I’ll be..just like glenn glenn said “some things just don’t change”…Shutttup glenn!

Bye fockers!

mommy

I love you MOMMY!!!

To the peepz joining me and Brigid..we can't change the date..[well,for me can la]..but Gid can't cuz she's only free on weekends. So we thought of meeting up. Since we didn't make it on Tues, I thought why not meet u guys on this day, Sat'day. I'm having BBQ chalet and I gotta meet Dad at 3pm..I dunno if I can extend the time though. So I thought of havin lunch with Gid but I dunno what time to meet up cuz I got limited time..so decide the time okaye then let me know...

stultified

Y'know..staying home is sooo my thing!!! haha..i NEVER get bored! So you can lock me up at home for all I care! Cuz I can tahan! So long as I've got my basic needs of entertainment...

I still go out la...I've been pretty busy with things..eversince I got back, I'd always have the "urge"to go out..but I slowed myself down cuz it'd mean spending..I can't just lay out $$ on things cuz I dun werk...so I decided to stay put at home..

Staying home can get quite boring sometimes..and when you've got nothing else to do..like say you're bored with TV or PC or whatever..it can get so stultifying! GASHHHH....and that's what I've been feeling lately..stultified! Then you'll feel kumfumbled...

And I thought of finding a job..but I don't think it's the right time..so here I am slacking me arse off, waiting for money to rain down on me..lol..so I can at least do something..I'm getting fatter..my thighs bigger..my face,cuter..I mean..having chubby cheeks...tummy bloated[lol..exagg]!..oh well..

Then came my long awaited prayer..

will tell you nextym..i'ma go knock off...

bye suckers...

my first home

I was very home-sick last week and started missing everyone back ‘ome and my 5/1 family as well. I went back home[phil] thinking..I’m matured enough for my age..but my cuzins told me that I was like a kid..my godpa told his wife jokingly “how old's Joanne already but she acts like Nika” [their daughter,who‘s only 10]…
And I thought about what they said..they were right..I was laughing at myself…but I guess I can’t help it…

See…Long, long time agooo, I grew up without cousins surrounding me when I came here..t’was just me and kuya[abang]. My childhood was..I guess..I can call it..a “boring” one. I grew up watching my local friends with their relatives; cousins, Grandparents…While me and kuya…t’was just us..how lonely can that be..though I did grow up with neighbors and my Filo friends…
So when I went home, I didn’t notice I was acting like a kid…probably because my childhood was sorta taken away from me..and so t’was given back to me to enjoy what was taken away…and I did…so very the friggin much…To the extent that I was in agony cuz I had to leave em…because coming back here would mean me getting home-sick and stressed up and lonely again.

Mom and dad’re going back for the “HOLY WEEK” trip. They’re gonna climb the Mt. Dolores and pray and pray and pray..lol..[so de religious]…well, it’s just a week trip. At first I thought I’d follow em back home but then I thought that if I come along, I won’t enjoy the trip cuz it’s just a short one and I’ll just start missing em again and of course I’ll only be seeking for a longer holiday and I’ll slack again. Don’t want that to happen..So I decided, I’ll stay here! All by myself. Kuya’ll be in Taiwan for training so it’s just gonna be me..FREEDOM babbeeehh!!! I can have a PARTY…then we’ll trash the fugging House..orite uh!

But I guez my folks won’t let me stay home alone. They’re gonna ask one o’ their friends to stay with me. [SPOILER uh!] Please don’t!!!! I won’t have freedom man! I won’t get to walk around the house half-naked! Or bare naked! [Geeeezzzz..] I can manage okaye!!! I’ll miss u guys but I don’t want any babI-sitters! Gawsh!
But oh well, if they let me stay home alone..I’ll have a party…Let’s’ve a Paaaarteeehh!

Otaye…whutevur…BYE suckers…

Hello People, Hello World!

Hello guys..I made another public blog. Not because I’m turning my back on the events that happened in my life in the previous blog. But because I think it’s a new year, same life, but I feel I’ve grown more as a person. [yeye not as matured as we all think we all are; but matured enough for me in this stage of my life..nope..not my age..but the stage in my life..]


I actually have two blogs, public and private. After I stopped posting on my previous public blog, I actually kept posting at my private blog. Private cuz it’s more of a diary and there are things I just can’t show to my friends. But oh well, I’m BACK!

exempted

Sometimes you just have to put an end on things you think you can't handle anymore..
You have to take small steps to do it..
You get irritated...mad...but at the end of the day, what have you gained?

Some people choose to smile and laugh on things rather than cry
Because they believe that crying won't solve the problem...and you gain nothing
Yes..smiling and laughing wont solve your problem too
But at least...you'll look beautiful...because you look at things beautifully when you do that...
Though not necessarily...but hey...you'll look younger! and you don't think about your problem that much anymore!!!

It's nice to be just at peace with everybody! and everything!
Right now I feel happy because I'm looking at things in a neutral way...I feel so peaceful...
The problems 've encountered...I take 'em all as experiences! and lessons...
So the next time I encounter another similar problem, I'd know what to do and will do my best not to repeat the mistakes I've made before...

come and smell the beauty of the world..what it has given you

like what a friend once told me...

"If you’re feeling down..remember the moments that took your breath away!

you gotta stop and smell the flowers

Choose to rmbr the happy ones.."

070706

no cam for today...juz used my hp..so here..e rest is video...

juz read sab's post...for what happened today...

BETTER..

MAINTAINING..

and will MAINTAIN...

Really too tired gettin involved...
Should really just shut the fuck up...
Some people just HAVE to misinterpret the things u say...
Too tired of giving in to people...

continuous..

I PROMISE

oh pipole...press the "R" on e tagboard if u cnt c e taggies aighty!

DON'T KNOW why...
but i juz feeel like SHIT taday...
F-A-C-K!

i have high hopes and dreams...
but i often think that with my bloody attitude towards learning,
i'll never achieve em..
but be optimistic..
when people or YOU ask dis qn to urself...

When is ur future behind u?
the answer is
When u stop chasing dreams..so don’t stop!!!

it may be a long way..and the road may not be straight n smooth...but u will still get there...
with juz some perseverance and determination,and HARD WORK of corz!

sch's back...haven't done a single shit..
bt ive promised myself...tmr onwards...muz b guai2
cant afford 2 slack anymor..
sux la..but its oni a few more months...n we'll all b freeeeeee...*ryt*...
sianz...ill do my best 2 keep my promise....n goal..
ive been keeping EMPTY promises ah...wahkao...

to clique 10..i tink we all have 2 b alone 4 awile..cuz wenever we're wid each other...we 4gt abt everything...its not a bad thing...bt lets juz do it? its 4 our own gewd...so ye!

damn...gotta c all e ppl i hate..haha..number 1...hu else...Mak Helmet! haiz...

cya!

TEACHERS COME....AND GO...

i'm not actually feelin anything right now...like..neutral..
but i juz wana blog abt sth before i go for camp..n will b away from my comp...4 awhile..[oh well,we cn use e sch's]

frm the many years of bein in cdss..many teachers have left...many...
it didn't affect me when i was in sec 1-3..din rili care..
but it's starting 2 kinda affect me..[well..since laz yr..end of laz yr...]

i juz feLT like..a lil sad..cuz MDM SUZANNAH left laz yr..n den..ms karen tau..ms yong...n MRS JULIET TAN...not forgettin..MDM TITI...was quite sad..but i accepted it..

but! this! year!....i tink a few more is leavin...
MRS IRIS LIM...hu took over poa teacher, mrs juliet...is leavin cuz...[damn i can't say y...]
my 1st impression of her wasn't tt good..so i din quite like her...so did our whole poa class...cuz she looked kinda lyk........snobbish?haha..
but as time went by..[abt weeks...] i started likin her...found her cool la..laid-back teacher..kewl 2 b ur fren..girlfren-material [hey girlfrend!..wana chill?]...she used 2 wakeboard..i forgot what her past time is la..bt yea..she is quite small..n petite..but hey she's stil kewl..she became one of the teacher-in-charge of our cca,DRAMA SOCIETY..almoz all hated her..but fuck em all...dey're dumb la! judge ppl oni...haha..i did judge her..but aft that few weeks..i thought, "hey y not giv her a chance to prove that she's not what we all think she is? she can't be that bad.."
n tt's wen i change my attitude 2wards her la...but she's left...i can stil remember...e laz day of sch...she came to our table..outsyd teacher's office..i apoligised 2 her 4 watever it is i did..did sth or not i juz apologised...oh well..wanted 2 reassure her tt i dun hate her or wat..den she told me that at 1st she thought that i couldn't make it...cuz my face n attitude was like e "heck-keh" type ah..den she lyk kinda shocked wen i passed or sth..haha..she kewl ah..sux she had 2 leave n another teacher takin over...NIE teacher...we'll c how it goes..

haiz..another teacher leavin! MRS GRACE..like...walau! she had this offer in taiwan..internat'l sch...which pays higher...happy for her la..but hello! n samor..her da husband! gg taiwan 4 duno wat shit la.den she say if he goes she oso la..den asked us 2 lyk persuade her hubby to not shift..wahkau...

all these teachers left cuz of 1 main reason...HER LA! SHE really pain in the ARSE man! she was supposed 2 leave but got extended for wat-ever-the-hell reason it was! honestly..all of us were like waitin 4 it noe! but lyk sway sial! wahkau...she scold2 student 2 b neat..e hair esp..bt look at her la! HELMET sia..worse than mine la! den the teachers oso she want to pick on them..she got no other better thing to do uh?! knn! tt's y w u ruling ah...cdss' reputation may not get recognised..come on la!haiyerr!waste out tym uh!

ahakz..kla.."complain..complain.."...eh juz expressin my feelings la! dunANY1 ever punish me for expressin my feelings on such stuff ok! actali SOME teachers myt agree w me la...SOME ok?!hehe..ok i juz judged another person..

Happy 22nd Anniversary MOM and DAD!!!!

Jo...

Tick Tock Tick Tock,
Is there something in your sock?
Oh wait its not X'mas,
nor you 21st.
Its your 18th for goodness sake!
So wadever I give, you have to take.
But since I am here and u are there,
and I know this isnt fair,
this is all I could give ya,
I will will make it up to you when I see ya.
My oh my you have grown so fast,
But this is never gonna last.
Coz sooner or later you are going to turn 20,
and then 30,40,50,60!
But trust me have fun while you still could,
I know that you would.
I am watching the world cup while doing this,
its just something that I cant miss.
This just shows that I am good at multitasking,
imagine me talking while me kissing.
Enough with my crap and back to where I started,
woops sorry I just farted.
So Happy Birthday again to you my D-A-R-L-I-N-G,
Stay young, smile always and be happy!


Lee Muhammad Johan
19 June 2006


Thanx a lot...haha...hmm..duno wat2say uh..
super thank u!
is all i can say 2 u
cuz i am speechless too!
uhhh...aren't u?
[hey tt rhymed]!

used 2 think she was those "minah" typa gals...haha..
im oni human..i judge...dun we all...

wanted her 2 b my kakak in sec2..she was in sec3 den..duno y..juz c her lyk e big sis material...nvr had a big sis..n always wanted 1..oh well..those were e days..i was young n stupid ok?!
den she came 2 my class..she sticked 2 ros like a glue...felt neglected..haha..nah..maybe a lil...
bt got 2 noe her bttr...IRRITATIN!!! bt FUNNEH...VERY FUNNEH...

got closer dis yr..our laz yr...she fell in luv w her current bloody boif...[sorry]..
n now? he's givin her e silent treatment...while she's der..waitin n waitin..not losin hope...hopin he'd b back...
she's 2 in luv w him...she's not possesive..shes not obsessed..juz in luv..bt der he is...treatin her lyk a used toy..

kids would juz ignore their toys wen dey dun lyk em anymore...n tt's exactly how he's treatin her..
1st he said he lyked her since blah3...den now? dun lyk her nemore la?
haiz...guys...juz cuz certain guys...think dey're too hand-friggin-some...dey treat gals lidat...

wenever shes w us..she puts on a smile...she crack jokes...she laffs w us...altho shes damn bloody hurt...tts 1 ting i shd learn frm her...

y do most girls go weak wen comes to guys? cuz guys r mostly known as e superiors? not all e tym...

girl..u shd be stronger! ur strong...bt be stronger ok?

luv u!

i hate it!!! had a friggin borrring dayyyyy tadeyyyy...
sch..chem practical..supposed 2 hav meeting w papa hoe n daddeeeh...cancelled..cuz twas gon rain...dang!...den went home...ate..slept...woke up...tv...comp...gosh!

supposed 2 hav bbq! den my kuz cancelled! waahhhhhhh....shoo baaaad! im dying here!!! i duno wa2do...can't study! gosh..ima fail mann...i hate mahself....oni 4 now...o welllllllll......BAAAAAWWWREEEEEENGGGG...

tata...

bday part1[080706]

sabby! lookin at amin ryt?
gosh! i spoiled e pose at e laz min!
better?
haha! amin! lookin wer?wakakka
ros laffin at me! cuz i was sitttin at wer she was lookin!;p!
e jun babis!haha..[viki,ros,me]..bear extra!
cakeeeyy
chey viki seiii
cut proply la!
mua!
ros,nunu
cute
ahakz...dis is our weapon! against bitches hu try 2 show deir stuff..haha..we got nunu

bday part2 [080706]

amiiiin! hapi eh? cuz y?
hahaha..ros hapi sei..lookin at her ree
i won dis race mann!!!
hmm...chillin...
haha..nunu?
y is amin always laffin or smilin big-ly wen e cam's on him? gee..

pe sey!
he looks lyk a scarecrow! ryt? wonder hu he's scaring..CHILLIPADI maybe? ahakz


we were "ballet-ly" trynna stretch 90 degrees..lol..even e guys!

Warsup BLOGGY!!! lollerz..im bbbbeeeaaaaccckkk!!!! Ye missed meh dincha?! Oh c’mon!!!

Otey2!!! i havent been too active in bloggin lately..affected by some things happnin ard here n der! Of corz…me n him r fine...but tt's not my prob la!..Abt my school cliquey...owell..shouldn't talk abt tt..im happeeh...at least for now..wakakaka...let's talk abt happy stuffs k?!

Wed[7/6/06]..4gt 2 greet rosie happy bday sia! until e IRP break..chat2 til rosie said sth den I remembered..haiyerr….”dis kind of fren!” den greeted her la…Den…chilled at frenz plc..slept der til dusk den headed home..lollerz…occupied e whole room n slept..on each other’s tummies..

Den thurs[8/6/06]…ahakz..went 2 harbour front for ros’ bday...bought cake, den ate at banquet..[suma us r broke..lyk me uh!]..Sang e bday song..aft singin 4 rosie..i confindently say “k..mk a wish” wen dey continued singin…4 ME! ahakky..Den fnish 4 me..den vicky…lol…Cute sia ros n ree…chey R&R..sei..[pe sey]..

Den2, went 2 DOUGH-BEE-GOAT..lol..den walked til we chilled at Lenson Place? [Ala..i duno e name bt oways go der..gong2 sia..] den lidat2 la…sit2..talk2..pic2…den pose giler2..[oni abit la]..den kena halau by e security guard? Cuz e residents complain..wat oni…COMPLAIN2! Action sia dose ppl…den we sit at e side la…den talk2..Den we separated frm e guys..gal talk..den go toilet..at e lenson place der..den went back 2 e plc wer we were chillin earlier..thinkin e guys were hiding...hahha!!! we[e gals] were lyk idiots lookin 4 e guys…thinking dey were playin hide n seek w us..in e end we found em at e friggin bustop! Den we all lyk dumbos “boo” here “boo” der..act lyk detectives..haha..good ting no one saw us! Prolly hav la..shiala…malu shial…ahakky!

Owell! I’ll update e pics tmr..nite! oh it’s morning..morneeen….

hmm..SYAFIE called us childish..that we're like kids
lyk wow?!! dude..r u even thinkin..? who's bein a kid here?
u fall in love? get heart broken...
now u INVOLVIN ur own friggin frenz?
spy here..spy der..hahaha...stupid dumbass

if only the teachers noe how HYPOCRITE u are..
u urself told us in school u hav 2 b good..well behaved..
so wat abt outsyd sch? u act lyk one hooligan la?

we forgave u...bt u started all ur shits agen
we forgave u even when u said UR NOT AFRAID TO LOSE UR FRENZ n ur PROUD 2 b ALONE
well i guez ur losin em one by one
alone eh?
so it only means one thing..ull never get married?

geez...oh well..anyway,b4 u call ppl KIDS...look at urself..
ask urself hu's bein DA KID!..u gt ur heartbroken n now ur like a KID...rollin on the floor..throwin tantrums juz cuz u didn't get wat u want...how's stupid...

Think dude...THINK...
ur a coward...can only throw words at us thru SMS? IM? TAG?
den face 2 face? haha...lyk one gong2 lidat..haiya....GROW UP la u...SORELOSER..lose 2 hairee oni den do dis...

there is a LITTLE TRUTH
behind every
"JUZ KIDDIN"...

so f u think ur juz kiddin
think agen!

ur hurtin some1's feelings..

my HARD FALL..i let cikgu down [I]

It's been buggin me for quite some time now..I tried to keep it to myself but I just realised that if I keep it to myself, then people wont get me..they'll get e wrong idea..So just gotta pen it down to probably let it out and at least release a coupla my many thoughts goin on in my head!

I can remember how I loved studying..doin assignments..goin school..learnin new things..touchin books..cleanin up mess [in my room of corz]..rearrangin em..helpin out..

I grew up for 7 years of my life..with maids around..doin things for us..for me..
When I came here..my parents told us “we have to do things on our own now.. can’t depend on maids..”..
cuz they realized we won’t be independent then..
Oh how I loved helping my mom out..cookin rice..washin dishes while standing on a chair..vacuumin and moppin e floor with the music on listenin to JORDY with my bro..at an age of 7 & 10..
I think..no..I know..I’m proud to have learned that all..N I knew how well-groomed I’d be when I’m bigger..NOW...
I don’t know why..but as I grew up.. I became lazy..a PROCRASTINATOR..MESSY..laid back[would take things as they come]..[but not grotty!]when before..I was a freak at almost about anything that’s gotta do about cleanliness..and studies..
It’s not what mom had taught me n kuya[bro]..
She’s always been damn friggin clean! She can’t leave the house or stay in the house without cleanin..she’d freak out [aaaaahhh!!!]...
Til today..oh well..~MOMS~!

my HARD FALL..i let cikgu down [II]

My Malay subject is one..
Ok.. REWIND
“I can remember how I loved studying..doin assignments..goin school..learnin new things..touchin books..” In primary 1..was supposed to take Chinese cuz my folks wanted me to..but the principal suggested that malay would be a better subject for me..at least I wouldn’t and won’t have any difficulty on the writing...of course..I agreed..

I enjoyed learning malay in primary 1 til about primary 4?..den I lost interest.. duno why..
I can still remember how excited I was everytime I had tuition..cuz I couldn't wait to learn new words..sometimes I’d even look at my brother’s assignments and try to answer em..
I can honestly say that I was quite a geek last time..I would touch all books..well, literally not all…
I just loved answering all the blanks on every page!Be it English, Math, Science..WHATEVER!
Loved swimming..piano..sketching..parties[every weekend]..sports[basketball]
I don’t know why..as I grew up..things didn’t make my life..well..funNER..as I thought it would..in-friggin-stead..it made my life..funLESS...
Somehow..somewhere, I just lost it..I’ve no idea when..and how..but yea..I just lost track and 'til now I’m strugglin to get back..

I always tell myself, "I’ll do it. I know I can..and I will..not cuz I should..but it's for my own good future.."
I realised that I’m only good at words..sayin things without doin em..
My words are shoutin way louder than how my actions should be..
I keep reassuring people that ima do my best..not JUST TRY..but DO..
But in the end..well..I..fail...Of course..failure is where we learn..pick ourselves up..do our best not to get back the result that we had..instead..we improve on em..yada..yada..yada..I already know all that..but I just don't apply it on myself..I guess many of us are like that..[oh c'mon...aaadmit it! lol]But yea..so I’m just one of you people..

my HARD FALL..i let cikgu down [III]

So yea..from primary 5 onwards..i kept floppin my Malay..
I guez I’m only good at beginnings..when you’re half way there…u give up..Halfway through..I gave up all my passions n hobbies..
Parties..sports..drawing..piano…swimming..
Of corz there’s a reason behind SOME of it..as to why I just gave up..It’d be pretty long to explain..but long story short..
Parties = grew outta it..started to hate goin out toooo
Sports =[gosh!] influenced by my new classmates who weren’t into PE!..so juz lost my stamina day by day from the day I stepped into this sec school!!
Drawing/sketching, piano = geez…lost interest..BUT REGRETTING..CUZ I WAN IT BACK! SO DAMN BADLY!
Swimming = dang!!! I was brought into the adult pool and I freaked out..almoz drowned..[had to cry in fronna my dad to let me quit!]

ANYHHHWAY! In sec 1..cikgu Roz told me to buck up..read malay books..newspapers..whatever sources to improve on my malay..& I NODDED..
Nex yr..sec2…sec 3…said the same thing..did the same thing..
But did I do what she said? NUH-UH! Not so.. Well..I did..I tried to read..but as I did, the words just became meaningless to me! meaning I couldn’t understand…
I felt like I was going blind..cuz I really duno what I was reading anymore..though I understood some of what was happening..

Then sec 4..mr Abdullah..I can’t say his teaching was boring..
But I guez I got used to cikgu’s teaching..stern..quiet..pressured..[hard u noe!]
And the people around me were always dozing off!
So of course..the tendency is that you’d be driven by it..not sayin I got myself into it..anyway..the room was right below..so really..the environment wasn’t at all that good! Oh well..

Now sec 5...back to cikgu’s teaching methods!
Happy yet..well..pressured!..haha! [liked it..but ye..]
It’s really not easy..I kept telling myself I wont let em down..
But I was still relaxed..like this school[students..not the teachers] has always been...lazy..procras-ers..laid back..geez..what a place..only a few are really determined not to get themselves get hooked by the fishing rod..
Though I know I cant blame this school…cuz I know every school I go to would be damn the same..maybe except for the top schools...

my HARD FALL..i let cikgu down [IV]

Did my malay 0’s on mon,290506..
How did I fair? Oh gosh! Dun ask!
I let cikgu down..I SUCK!!!
I know why..I didn’t take her advices..go in..go out..

I have this tense feeling when I see cikgu Roz..I’d keep quiet n all..
Cuz she’s really someone I admire..she’s good..she’s cool..
But I didn’t show her how big of a fan I was of her..
I cried..yes I did..cuz I was stupid..I let her down..
She’s too dedicated in her students..not really work..
I saw that..cuz she’d NEVER absent herself from school for no reason..even if she’s sick..like now!!!
I saw her passion in sharing her knowledge with us..
How I wish I can turn back the friggin time and redo my mistakes..right from primary school..yep! primary school..where I began to keep falling…

It’s really hard..and damn pain..I can’t redo what’s done..all I can do is improve on it..but the problem is I dunno how to get it back..
Yes..yes..step by step..slowly..i know!
But still can’t..
Then u’ll probably say..”patience…”
Patience! When is it gonna come back to me? how long will I have to be friggin patient? When my results are out? “failed” oh me gaaawsh…
Cannot la! wahlau!
Every night since sec 3..my bedtime prayer..I’d always remind Him to give me confidence..determination..strength..
I did get it..but only for awhile..
I know what He gives me is only the starter..then I gotta run it myself..but, oh well...
I guez..if we really want our determination back..even if we’re wounded by the hook of the fishin rod..we gotta let ourselves out and heal ourselves and voila! Ur alive again...movin on..

Hmm..I say so much..but if I could only apply it to myself..geee...

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded

at least i look a lil fairer than shahir here..haha!!!

haha...i remmbr mr raj asked..."ANYMORE QNS...OK MY TURN...Y IS UR NOSE FLAT?"

ok fine! so it's FLAT! but at least it ain't as bad as A...gaaahhhhh...nvm..hahahaha...jeluz ryt?!