fall on me

cleanin the house, *phew* arduous...
guests have left, finally over...

feeling: sad
reason: got lobang but mami don't let me work -_-'

*whinges*
~~2130~~
sian lor! at least people offer job then can earn my own money from my own sweat. that oso duwann! waleooo...you know i don't ask for any but at least you won't feel bad or troubled thinkin if i need money right? haizzz...now have to wait for money to drop from heaven all the way down to my the ceiling to my floor and hands. sob sob...siann lar! but anyway i was also erratic about working; teehee. to get my heavy tush up, it takes alot of humongous strength and will - for me. so yeap! but i think uh, if still got lobang and related to food then maybe i take ba!


~~oo15~~
just finished hangin kuya's army uniform...the only reason why i hung them is cuz mama told me to. but i decided to wait for him to come back to do it himself. soo...
> he came back, i told him, he went to the laundry then back to his room. on the way to the bathroom, thinkin he had already hung em...*waleoooooo*...still wait for me wan! @#$%^&*

sian lor! last night slept at 4 then woke up at 930, cleaned my room til 230, had brunch til 4, then vacuum and mop the whole house til 6, bathed til 7, while bathing guests arrived 'redi, cleaned toilet *ugh* til 730, dressed up til 830 then finally dinner! wahhh! @#$%^&* tired sia! this is what happens when people procrastinate. *sigh* took me approx. 5hours to clean my room which i should have done since tuesday =.='...

*sigh* i soo miss having a helper who's pro in this kind of work...but maybe it's a good thing because if by now we still have one, i think i'll be the laziest person you'll ever know. ouh well.

~~

everyone starting from mrs chui onwards til today [ate Vec] said i've thinned. *ugh*

and my eyes are darker. *panda eyes!* teehee. my only asset...haha. okaye more people to meet, more comments to hear! bring it on bebeh!

drinkin milk

hi.
after yesterday's kvetching, i'm not mad no more; 'cept for the greedy people's taking away of the only thing that a woman in that situation can hold on to. how sad.
aaanyways, i'm cheery today! mom's at home! weee! and she bought me my favvy! i love her to death! heee!

i don't love mom and dad and kuya because i need them.

i need them cuz i love them!

oooookaye. aaaanyways...

i got to chat with a long time friend of mine and she told me she actually tracked me down to tell me she witnessed my dumping my

then-boyfriend at Gombak station. gee. funny she actually

"tracked me down" just to tell me that. she was gonna approach me but i already walked off to meet sabz and nunu. the way she "narrated" it was hilarious. lol. and she said that after all these years, i was still that bad ass lass she knew.
but i opposed, "eh! to think of it uh, it wasn't that bad what; i have been carrying that thing the week before, hoping to finally dump it but didn't get the chance to and on that day i was finally releived i got to return it. heavy you know! carry that shit everywhere for very long. too heavy til i accidentally dropped it..."
tahha. okaye, whatever. well, i just never thought there would be familiar people at that time to see me do that. besides, it has been years since we last met, yet i was still recognised - amazingly. waaah. kaye lah. don't say liao. very the that one.


eh, SABotitotot, thanks for the bloody long ass overdued pics uh!

wicked people...

dear blog,

as of now, i don't know how to look at things anymore; whether to still look on the brighter side or just be on the adverse...
i am very anxious about what's gonna happen. i'm thinkin it's all just another trial. but to think again; when he broke the news to me about it, my heart just sank. tita's situation's already bad, and the last thing she needed was to get that. isn't what she's experiencing enough of the hardship she's goin through? still, 't all got worse. and one of her many bad situations is sadly what we're also goin through. gonna have to wait for that til then. but i think it's just depressingly hurting that out of the many fucked up

green-eyed evil people in there, they chose to eye on and target the good people to chuck out. worse still, is that those supposedly intelligent big shots, stupidly beleive on the things they never SEE. why don't you SEE for yourself first before you fucking act on it?! why'd you have to beleive those assholes so easily?! i thought y'all're supposed to be the

L-E-A-D-E-R-S? in the end, you're all just the bunchha brainless ones. i don't know what's gonna happen really. but i just hope that there'll be a BETTER offer for them that those fuckers will fuckingly fucking regret. *sigh* and what i just said,

"one sheyt after another"...

and all my brightside perso will say,

"things happen for a reason...", "...He's got better plans for us", "just beleive"

*sigh*



yours truly,
joanne

sighness

~~1922~~
okaye, i know i cuss all the time. not at all really nice for a female to be doin that. butbutbut, if for anything, i'd rather show my ugly-self than the beautiful[inner] side. why? cuz then you'd know who's tough enough to hold on to you rather than you showing your nice-self at first and then the ugly; finding out that they talk sheyt behind your back. truth be known, i'd prefer to be identified as the ugly one both in and out right in the first place than in the last; where people will start to fall out on you. bottomline, showin my true colors. lalala. okaye, that's all.

~~1845~~
okaye, a lil bett'r now. still swillin on coffee; it keeps me goin. well, i know i've mentioned before that i will never expect anymore. but isn't it hard to do what you tell yourself what to do than what you really feel? so then i say i won't expect anymore but the way i feel is that i have to...*sheesh* well, never mind. for now i feel better, i'm not so watered[sad] as i was just now. *grins*

~~1700~~
i am craving for spaghetti. but there's no spag sauce! how the fuck can i make it! *sheesh* i'm just feeding myself with chicken cocktail; it's the only food my tongue likes in the fridge -__-...i should live in a mall next time, therefore i need not go out. *sigh* i feel there are more sheyts to come. one bad sheyt after another; it just keeeeeps comin...

~~1400-1700~~

as of this time, i'm swillin on coffee.
feeling so f.b.t.d.
dunno why but i've been musing over sheyt.
sheyt like what things i'd be doin in these kind of times. i wouldn't be doin or feelin this sheyt if i hadn't chosen that. *shtewpedd*
yesyes, i am feeling down. i haven't been in a few weeks now, have i? i've been so busy being all cheerful, that i've overlooked on being all gloomy.
now don't go sayin sheyt, cuz i am - just a human being after all. i feel like i'm falling off again. FUCK!
and as of this time, words of encouragements d-o-n-'t w-o-r-k.
i just feel like eradicating you. yes, you. you two-faced, hypocritical, false, insincere, deceitful, double dealing, disingenuous, duplicitous, treacherous, you!
*sigh* i just needta release this; i can't suppress no more.
i deserve what i need because i got duped. when will i get it? i'm gett'n impatient already. whatthehell! but at the same time i know i have to wait. i can't impose on things just like that just to make me feel better, i know it has to be right, at the right time.
i'm sorry i just can't help it. the last thing i need is making the wrong turn - again. temptation strongly dominates me and sometimes i can't control it. butbutbut i have to be strong, that, i know.
if there's any place i can be right now, it'd be gramm's. i'd rather be in her arms; embracing me with her wrinkly soft arms. i just need her comfort. the comfort no fucking one can give me. *sigh*

and after all that outburst, my positivity tells me, "ouh well, it'll pass..."

-_~...

wake up!!! do ur thanggg...

*stoning*...

~{girlishness}~
psssssst!!! my hs crush called last night. haha.

~{back to normal}~
what an ass...i miss the days already. sorry but i hope the next time, i'll be able to make it. haha, only deedee met up with faie and mirul, attendance: 3/10. ouh well, still got next time :) hope it'll be 10/10!
glad to have heard from you again though. it's been like, gazillion years already you mofo sheyt! i miss the guys too! wonder how louhan's hair's like now, wakakaka.

~{girlishness}~

aww, i'm pretty happy to hear the voice of the previous CDSS soccer team captain! and most especially, who once haddd something fo...uhh

N-NNE-NEVER MIND! i'm just too overwhelmed; got carried away, teehee.

~{back to normal}~

i feel like goin back to those days where you guys were still wearing "low-shorts", mirul burn'n his leg hair [busok giler siol!] and kelly's too [she got kinda mad] one time and hasbullah rebelling on the teachers; most especially mrs viswa [aka penguin] and and and making mr siow [aka einstein] cry after all the bullies and the throwing of papers at him and just giving him a hellavafuckinhardtime teaching! *pants*

~{girlyly}~
we were so young back then! so cute and all [well, except for mie at least *humble* =p]
*sigh* memories...how i wish i can relive them, and maybe ditch vans for him.

~{back to normal}~
haha. kiddin'...
PS FIDADOTDOTDOT...FYI, HE'S NOT MY "ALL-TIME CRUSH", JUST "THE HS CRUSH" :)

fuck sheyt. i racked out last night at 2am and mom woke me up at 6 to see her off and then jumped back in to dream more dreams but but couldn't get back to lala land...lerrrr...so i got up and've been on the screen since then. 'i want candy' is a great flick. dunno why i actually have to go out and squander my bread when i can just sit my tush and watch 'erre. ouh yea, it's "the friends". i forgot, hehe. quality time with friends is important. lalala. whatevurr. just kidd'n. okaye lah.

~{girlylyly}~
movie postponed to monday cuz of my fucking zits. *sigh* hope it's gone by then.
aww, i know my skin is never that flawless anyway. but still, zits just makes it all even worse! it's already bad, enya still wanna make it worse! *sheesh* pick someone pretty will ya?! we ugly gals dun deserve extra sheyt to just give us more hard time on looking neutrally well! *ughhh*

~{back to normal}~
fuck! i feel i've been experiencing famine this week. e'rrbody's busy, no food to scoff, lazy to walk all the fucking way to greenridge to buy food, no sheyt, no dosh, no FUN larr!!! *ugggghh* i've literally no one to depend on! folks come home late, so i can't bug em to buy me sheyt, arch camp [duh], friends...well, i live too damn far for them to even drop by, say hi, [and if so happens, fortunately] with some food on their hands! *sigh* but too bad.

plus plus, dad called at 730+ to inform that there was a quake. city area felt the tremors and north side too i guess? well, it's either bukit panjang actually also felt it or was i just "feelingless"...aww shux! wasted! i missed it. i haven't experienced such sheyt!

*sheesh* this week's been a disaster already! well, maybe except for a few events. but really, the worst disaster i guess is famine [lol, what a bad word to use]. okaye! owwwtta herre.

knock on my door and say "hello" and we'll dance crazy

here here dawdling on the second day...but not til a slack-jaw fortunately, i'm not the worst y'know!


~~

ninang genie and i're plannin for kuzzie giannina's 18th birthday come next early april...kuzz jen wants to celebrate her Debut here. so i guess it's a project for joanne.
"ProJiDy" is what i should call it; as in ProjJD, just like the planner's a prodigy!

kool ey? [cuz i'm DANK like that!]


~~

ouh, i got 86 for MME test 2weeks ago. lol, im swanking...was too lazy to brag about it last week. lol. wf?!
but but i think for CMO's exam yesterday...is gonna be a fluff. :( hope not though. imagine, all my tests i did well, but this exam...*sigh* only because i procrastinated on my revision. ouh well, sheyt sheyt.


~~

chalet next week. stoked bout'it! but but i dunno howzit gonna turn out. hope it doesn't bore me. please don't? anyone can come meet me. gonna tell you the addy and you can come peep if you're too shy to meet me. just don't stalk me aight? not til i'm stark-naked in the bath...wakakaka! dancing my ass in'erre.

catcha later!

you're too nice doode

~~

glad to be break-ing now *phew*
finally, quality time for hobbies and interests...

~~
unexpectedly finished :(
Halo3 to lend me? anyone?


~~
kinda pratajoyed pratasfied. thanks kid.

all i ever needed is a sincere sorry...

Haven’t you ever felt incomplete even after you’ve gotten what you wanted? Like as if something else was missing…

So then someone asks,
“okaye, so what do you want? What more do you want?”
A long pause; thinking scrupulously…
And then I say,
“It’s what I need…”

Cuz didn’t you just get what you wanted? Yet you still feel you lack of something? So you think hard whether it’s what you really want or what you really need…
You never really get what you always want right? It’s that, most of the times, you get what you need. People prioritize needs more than wants. And call me demanding and sheyt. But it’s just what I really need…but I need to receive it only when someone is ready and genuine enough to really give it.

just one of the many things

timed: 1316h

few years down the road,
"are you happy to have met me?"
"i'm thankful to have met you"

each time we make a decision, whether it turned out good or bad, haven't you thought about "what if" you chose the other path? i'm sure you have. and it's not necessarily called "regret"...well, maybe if it turned out bad for you and you'd be full of angst, then that'd be "regret". but when you've regained equanimity, you'd start to reflect...many things may not've worked out well in our lives, but i don't think i'd regret any of it. i'd be thankful it happened even if i'm not happy it happened.

and right now i'm wondering, is this my optimist side talking? perhaps? because i think again if i were full of ire, would i actually write this way? see all the "if"s?
a nice thing to ponder about eh?

i've got a minutiae for you. most of the things i ponder about appears while i wash the dishes...pretty weird we both may think. but i guess, it's the best time or the best doin for my mind to be contemplating...

no brat after all

dad hasn't been walkin that well; gout.
~and last night, 9plus, when mom came home, i told her i was craving for something. she nicely responded, "why didn't you call me?". [i didn't cuz i know she was tired]
dad then came home, 12, and i told him the same thing, and he said "why didn't you tell me earlier?" and of course i didn't cuzza his gout and it was already late he must be whacked. but what touched me was when he added, "do you wanna accompany me to buy it for you?"
~this morning, dad asked if i could do te groceries cuz mom's at work, and he had to leave for work too, and all i could say was "ouh, but i'm havin exam on mon..." with that stupid face...then dad said "spoiled brat ka talaga noh..."
~now dad just called, and i requested for something again and he said okaye and even asked what else i wanted...

*sigh* how blessed am i to have such parents! even if they're all fagged and havin pains around...plus plus they arrive in a bad environment [didn't clean] and there isn't any food for them to eat, they'd still do anything for you.
which made me think; am i a brat?! what makes up a brat?!
i'm indolent, i whine, i let them get me what i want, i can get away with things easily and they never mind, they do things i'm supposed to do and maybe much more. some friends think i am spoiled which seldom shows when i'm around 'em.

hmmm...but i guess one thing i'm never a brat with is when comes to money. i never got the habit of askin for cash just to splurge on useless things unlike kuya :) so can i say i'm not a brat after all?

i've been at home all by myself this week, again. folks often reach home between 9-12 and kuya in camp of course. *sigh* i hope tomorrow we'll be together. i miss them.

living it well baby

a question i asked myself few days ago...

"are you happy?"
"emmm, i'm contented..."

great :) being satisfied i guess, is enough to make God and the people around me feel that they are important to me. yes yes...well, at least i'm not a hypocrite anymore; to say things that aren't meant and supposed to be said. i do mean what i say now; not that i didn't back then but i haven't been really real for four months. i won't say shit just to make people smile and make 'em feel at ease...ain't that bettur? i won't be such a nice gurl who says nice things just cuz she's afraid of hurt'n people's feelings anymore.

eg1 "do you think i'm fat/cute/handsome/pretty?"

me: [sarcastically]"don't you have eyes to see for yourself?!" or [seriously] if i think you really are then i'd say yes, if not then i'll say no.

but well, i'm sure it heavily depends on the situation, don't you think?!

eg2. "do you like/love me?"

me: [depends on the percentage]

but if you're talking to someone who's about to die, emm, you either let em die knowin the truth [that can hurt and eventually kill em...] or be all nice with em...

so yeap. just one of the few things i've learned; being really true and straight-out honest, but still being sensible! ;)

i did some back-read'n and my very first post in THIS blog,
"...I feel I’ve grown more as a person. [yeye not as matured as we all think we all are; but matured enough for me in this stage of my life..nope..not my age..but the stage in my life..]"

hmmm, then i guess i've matured at least a weebit! in this stage! my 19th year in this world, started out okay-ey, but exactly a month later, screwed things up, but learned from it, got up, aaaaand living again! great ;) it's sooo...okaye wait, i'm fagged, lemme get some rest yah?! i'll continue...

**ouh and btw, 5/1 suck!!! none has sent any of the fffucking photos from bbq. sad...

surely, somma y'all will be going "eeeyerr, never get photo oni say suck oredi..."

and i'll just go "yeah yeah, whatevurr...[with an eye-roll]"

lol. just playin' around...ouh but then again, there is a LITTLE TRUTH behind every "JUZ KIDDIN"...so yeap! hehhe ;}

g'bye!

dipsy

*ampuchangamang yan oh*

haha! i learned that word! so funny! u gosta hear me say it! it's tagalog...i don't know how to spell it though, i just spelled it the way i pronounce it. *teehee!* it's an expression like "oh shit!", "what the fuck", "dammit"...

well, those really ain't the direct translation but yeah.

e-x-p-r-e-s-s-i-o-n! geddit?!

anyways, isn't God good? [all the time] and all the time, [God is good]...awww, i miss YFC already. "God is good...all the time...and all the time...God is good" we used to always say that.
okaye, anywayyyy, 2posts ago, i was reminiscing about the phils. and and how i wanna go back and all. well, God has his way of makin everyth'n happen. He doesn't give it right away but He has a way of giving it. and yeap! i'm gett'n it! awww...i know! how sweet!

i wanted to blog about this days ago, i just wasn't in the mood to. so here it is...
i know how you guys feel when you read some of our posts and you go "omg! that's how i feel too!" or "omg! that's what i was/am thinkin of..."

i realised that our lives are all really connected. well, i mean things happ'nin in our lives or how we think...there are unpublished posts i've written and reading your blog posts caught me eyes when i saw things that i've written are there too. how cool dat? lol. our lives are intertwined. so yeah. i'm too lazy to elabo. but maybe some of you dig me. *nods* uhhuh-uhhuh. i'll publish the posts when i'm in the mood of publishing 'em aight?! kool. great. lol?!

i am so bored. i hafta start my revision but but i'm lazy. haha. that is so not surprising to hear right?! lol. i've yet to clean my crib, [which as a procrastinator always does] will leave it til mom or dad comes home. i hate rushing but i always do it.

shtewped-ped-ped-ped...ahakz. okaye, GODAI....

sheyt! i need to dook!

"...don't be a wimp..."

return

why is it! that when i'm all inspired to post i'm never infront of the comp?! then when i finally get the chance to, i don't feel like posting anymore...gee...

it all comes just like that, but i never get to pen it down :[
awww...actually i've many things to say. but in no apt frame of mind. like the aura's different y'know?! y'don't? ouh whatever then.

i'll just come back when i feel like it..

take me out!

sup y'all?!
Fuck y'all!
*whoops*?! i am so habitually using that fucking word!! ouh fuck!

i have been eating my Fav foods so far. great!
started on Fri with Sting Ray then Sun with Pizza then yesterday with Donut then today with KFC'S crispy chicken and Donuts again; [which made me think of why it's become an "in" thing now in S'pore ~.~] i think tomorrow iiiis emmm, not sure lah. but maybe Thurs i'll have Sushi or Bagel...then Fri maybe Hokkien Mee or Prata or McFries or BK'S Turkey Bacon Burger or Shawarma or Taco Bell or Ceasar Salad or Mud Cake or i better stop this food-sheyt now?!

ouh! got something to tell you! i didn't get to take a crunch yesterday nor Sunday, and not even today. so yeah, pretty nasty farts today. it's never usually like that! lol. i better stop this now. it's probably grossing you out...hahaha! all the better actually! wakakaka. *adds* i hope i get to punch a dook later :P [okaye, enough!]

i haven't been drinkin coffee as much as i used to last year cuz the effect is really wild! lol. i forget so many things i have even forgotten my name sometimes. *nods* yup, really.

anyhoo, i miss Arch already...*random*

i kinda miss the phils. Mega Mall and Mall of Asia are my Favs. i miss roaming around Glorietta Mall; in and out of Aunt Tere's shop. i miss the tagalog convos i hear whereever i went. i miss commuting, sucking in all the smoke.
ouh! i miss the street foods; bbq and all. i miss Yellow Cab Pizza, Max's Resto, Aunt's place in Greenhills.
OUH i soooo miss Enchanted Kingdom and Star City! rides baby!!! *sigh* wonder when i can go back there again. :[ will you take me there? okaye?! set! *haiz* homesick siol!

five-week school break, nowhere to go. so boring. duwanna work, cannot go back to phils, no allowance [cuz i never like to ask for any] which means no gimmicks [unless at your expense] where you'll totally rather forget about hanging with me after reading those three words ;p
so what do i fucking do after all my scheduled plans have passed? *melancholy*
gee, and to think i was so looking forward to this break sheyt! now that i've actually thought about what i'm gonna do, i'd rather just go to school :[ fuck sial! lannnn-tern lah! eh yah, Lantern Festival coming right?! or is it Mooncake Festival? or both?! siala!

one more exam and freaking-boring-cuz-i-no-money [i always no money! haha] hols is here. hopeless daughter-of-a-not-bitch! i duwanna work...but eh!!! any of you all got any slots for work text me uh! i need dosh mann!

i've always wanted to try "food tasting" job but dunno whether got anot?! easy right?! eat eat eat oni. skali they let you taste shit you oso eat. what sia! *haiz...* if i really got nothing, then i guess i'm going back to being a couch potato ~__~ omg...what a life. some more i dunno many people who're celebrating birthdays this month. fuck sia. no parties :[
cannot hang with or even depend on Arch cuz he's laying out all his fucking pay on his fucking yet another $500 phone bill. OMG. i'm soooo pooor. *this is a total misery*

H-E-L-P leiiii....
boring uh!

"you can't always "not do" something just cuz you think it's wrong even if you wanna do it...

no one can stop you from how and what you feel...don't hold back...don't be afraid...say it..."

shit! i thirst for margarita right now...

randomness

sam: "hey,if u have a wish...wat would it be?"
me: "i wish to fulfill my parents' dream before i die BEFORE them"

it's so hard to keep up because so many things happen, even in a second!

i miss the good times...coming late for school, gett'n caught by papa Raj; sending me for detention then gett'n lectured by papa Hoe next for comin late ~_-, hiding from Helmet principal Ms Chan for my fucked up attire. i wanna be in that classroom, seated with bugger; drinkin nescafe and eating burger, lazing around, head always glued on the table [sleeping], fucking around with the teachers who still love us even if we were that notorious nut-case bunch, copying answers from those guai-guai friends, strolling around the corridor looking for trouble or just laughing at those freaks below who are just making a fool outta themselves, locking the teachers out so we can't have tests! being sent out by mrs beh for not doing her homework, annoying Malathi with my fucked up hair and tucked out shirt and short skirt and ankle socks, gettin caught by my ever favvy Papa Raj for never wearing school badge, sitting at those tables outside class doing our revision; which would later be channeled to chattin, listenin to ah chui's bad day with her other classes and how relieved she is to be finally in our class,

ouh shit i can go on and on and on on and on and on!

anyways, pardon my obscene lang for all my posts. i know you should be thinkin, "this girl uh, her blogskin all about God, so Holy and all, but see her language...all got 'fuck' 'fuck' one!" hahaha! weel, i grew up saying it! just never at home :)!

"don't be afraid to say you miss me just cuz you think it's wrong!"

i love you, my Lord, my God

what can be better than spending your day with your loved ones. in His Home. with your clan!
just wanna thank God for celebrating this delightful day with my dear folks and my beloved brother, Arch! there's no occasion but we are all thankful we have spent this entire day as a whole fam, because we hardly get a hold of Arch who's never home even when he gets the chance to and has never stayed home for even 24hours in a whole week [if you count the whole 7days]

it's a "miracle" we attended mass as a fam [it's been months ~_= ] and the feeling was terrific!

Holding Mom and Dad's hands in the cab; listening to their natterings about our future plans was something i missed!

Arch and i shared some zany stuffs that we wanna do. thing is, we both wanted to do the same things! lol! nifty!

after mass, Mom and Dad wanted to go home but i insisted on eating out since it's been ages since our last fam day out. since i was craving for something cheesy, i decided we just go for PizzaHut's Cheesy Bites Fondue since it's the only cheesiest food i could think of at that point...

[any place with cheesy food y'all can reco? and no pasta sheyt nor cheese cakes cuz they never satisfy me! i want a place! not just cheesy food!]

anyway, they agreed cuz they couldn't make up their minds...tsktsktsk...

Arch shared his yet another action-packed experience at Peninsula the other day when he fought with five mat-baju-fucking-ketat-siol guys. only two actually; the other three backed out after the other two got slammed. a security guard witnessed and called the police and let my brother and Brendz go since he saw that the mat-ketat-budaks-like-kental-only wanna look for trouble. wakakaka. whaddahell. my folks thinks that Arch has never been jailed for his fights. *sigh* if they only knew...how sad. you should really lie low lah brudder! as much as i enjoy seeing live actions, i'd rather see you chilling your ass off outside with B

than chillin your arse off in a cell with big gay boys, lol. you mofo you.

after dinner, Dad and Arch went to do some groceries for his outfield while Mom and i were shopping for her clothes. i took one basket of chocolates for myself since my fucking friends say i've thinned! even Arch said that! Mom and Dad as well; even teasing me about

the ex not lookin after me ~_=.

so FINE! i'm gonna FATTEN myself up and show you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you and you! *hmpppffftttzzzz* lalala [rolls eyes]... dah lah kau...salakau...

okaye, i'd like to take this opportunity to sincerely apologize [and i so fucking mean it!] for criticizing many many, numerous, loads of, countless people and maybe even non-living things! i know it's wrong but couldn't help it then. but but i've learned to control myself from lashing because i don't wanna get karma lah sia! no, but really. from now on, i will not do that. :)

and so, for God has forgiven us all, so shall thee forgive me!

goodnight and much love TO me FROM y'all.
feel free to text me and say you miss me cuz i know you do. lol!
we should really chill asap!
i'm oddly in high spirits and even the people i hate won't ruin my mood.

that's how weird i fuckin am. tahha.

"criticism is the cheapest form of boasting"

- Father Edmund Chong

talala

emmm, okaye, i don't know what's worse?
being open or being surreptious about that?

ever since i came clean about my ex-boyfriend to my folks, they've been inquisitively questionin me about it. *ugh* that is why i have never told em about my past relationships; not that any of em were serious; PUPPY LOVE! i initially even hesitated opening up about this latest failure [which i consider not serious too?!] from the start cuz i didn't want em to "interrogate" me with every single day that passed by; "what's the scoop? what's the scoop?!" ~_=

then i start to think, maybe they're just excited because they think that this is my "FIRST" ever to have a courtship and me being their baby girl, it is their "duty" and of course they being my folks, have the authority to do so. i so totally dig what they're doing but of course on my side, even if i dig em, i still hate it!

see, even if we live in a modern world now, and courtship-sheyt is sooo yesterday, i would be more thrilled than ever to go through it than to have it the modern way.

call me a conformist but old-school style is still the "artistic way" of winnin a girl's heart and what makes the girl's heart go

thump, clang, wham, chink, bang, ding-dong, rat-a-tat-a-tat! lol!

yep, for the past few years i've learnt and grown so much from all these sheyt that in the end, all those went down the drain when i got b-linded. tahha!

at least i learned my lesson...

well, not the end of the world, many more fishes to catch!

i want a clownfish; Nemo or a dolphin!

anyway, Hi!

the undisputed unifed 5/1

hey hey!
HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY day day day day...
lol! i ditched Dover's celebration to go to CDSS's...
my dear kambing overslept! but i was still the last one to arrive at the bustop...*diao*
first person i saw was [my first HS bf for 6days!],jonathan. then i spotted Nafeesah and Aishah[putih]...dayyyym i miss Naf! she's grown bigger! so cute...like bear liddat! haha! kiddin'...
the fucking new principal didn't wanna let us in to the hall; no colored/highlighted hair and slippers =_-" well, us being the "undisputed defiant batch in the history of CDSS", sneaked our way in, while some stayed in the canteen waiting patiently, and the others went to complain. the security guard oso like fuck liddat! act so big but actually like one small f-ly liddat! knnbclj! cikgu Roz and papa Hoe tried to save us...but to no avail. coupla minutes later, they allowed those in proper [although not totally proper] attire in. but in the end, those "rejected" 'uns also got in... wtf?! they so wasted their time lah; averting us...like we even care 'bout your order-sheyt liddat. *waleooo*
the concert was okaye. i had crazy fun; screamin our asses off while almost everyone was lookin up and finding who the fuck was makin the shrieks. [me, Dee and Nunu the most] too bad Sab wasn't there! i was dissin' someone related...emmm, hiiiii...hahaha. wtf!
after concert, i got to chat with Elaine and Nissiel. *sigh* sad lah, people change...instead of filos gett'n together, they backstab one another...wtf! oh well, sheyt happ'ns...you'll be okaye my friend!
emmm, we went to meet papa Raj, the first teacher we snapped with, followed by cikgu Roz then Ah Chui. met and greeted papa Hoe, Mdm Fatimah, Liang, Terrence, Beh, Viswa [the penguin] and Roy...the longest chat was with ah Chui...we even squeezed some gossip in our convo about Malathi! the never-ending-not-only-naggy-but-squeaky-no-wonder-still-a-single teacher in school! OMFFG!? *whoops!?*

Sab, Nunu, Dee, Nurdin and I lunched and chilled at Causeway Point. on our way down, Sab's shoelaces got stuck on the escalator so the people behind were like panickin [or some sort]. there was this fucked up lady [with her small kids], dumb enough to even forget her fucking manners and was so self-centered, being inconsiderate and all; just kept bellowing "fasteeeerrrr, fasterrr" all because she was afraid to fall! omfg! like hello? my friend's already stuck and all you cared about is you falling down and gett'n stepped on?! wtf! i was behind sabby so i too was struggling to get out but i was struggling more on helping her and making sure she doesn't fall. call yourself a mother! motherfucker...i yelled back at her and thennnn back to normal...haha..lanjiao..we chilled outside CP, enjoying the breeze and doin some catching up and talking.

Thanks to Abang Nurdin for the company back. Gentleman abang.

BBQ! at yeelyn/yeewon's place...
before heading to the bbq, had to do something i've been longing to do few weeks ago. =_-"
fast forward>> while waiting for Sab n Nunu at Gombak station, i tought i saw Thiru! true enough when we reached, Thiru was there! yey!!! he so totally felt guilty after whining at him the night before. haha! i knew he wouldn't let me down! i'm ecstatic! YiJuan turned up too! *sian* thought u sick then no need see your face liao! lol...jk!
i was so stoked just seeing everyone! sad didn't get to really bond with the rest cuz we were just so caught up with our own cliques. how

sad :[ but still glad :]...Nunu's BBRRREEAAASSST! was the talk of the girls, at least most of us. [all started with ah chui noticing it] Nunu's gone fatTER...*whoops?* and i've shrank thinNER. [anorexic YOUR fucking asses!] well, at least thank you to Ping Sian for saying i look sexy...haha! at least she never say anorexic lorrr...haha! wtf! i don't like to throw away my food just for the figure. like how stupid. i eat small portions though [for those who were asking how i kept my fig] lol. klah i'll stop! don't roll eyes redi lah. later drop!
i got to eat 3 chicken wings, 3 hotdogs, 3 fishballs, 2crabsticks and some snacks. slow cook lah! but at least it was better than last year's! Jie Ying was really very nice to cook for us and send food to us even. i love her! the guys then wanted to play soccer but the gals wanted Cap's Ball so being the UNITED class, 5/1 '06, they all decided to play CB [*wapiak!* Cap's Ball lah! not CiBai hor!] *class spirit y'all* but like fuck lah! guys against gals. obviously the guys won lah! gong!

but danng! mem'ries! good times...
let me rap this up with
= a big THANK YOU to y'all! for organizing this.
= HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIM LIN FENG aka WICKED AURA...
= great seeing ah Chui the ah lian teacher/friend again.

[she's cute when she's stout.]
= glad to have met Ros and Nunu and the rest again.
= thank you to GLENN and SHYUKUR for the wonderful BIG presents...

i like the vibrating spongebob pillow and the BIG mug [perfect for a small ger]!
= i love 5/1 to bits!
more to come bebeh!!!

HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY

*phew*

--edits--
just as today's about to end, dad had to push it!
i don't know why he makes such a big deal out of me sleeping in the late afternooon/early evenin. im fagged and you know i'm used to sleeping late! omffg! like im still his baby! wait~ i AM still his baby! hehe! well, i napped in their room cuz mine's in a total freakin mess! [dunav to go further;

it's undaztood-ed redi! -_-"]. Mommzy was wakin me up for dinner but i was too sleepy to get my tush up...til dad came in to change and found me still snoozing..so Dad just had to carp at me! *ugh!* even over dinner...*sheesh* so i was quiet throughout...til five minutes later, he tickled me...and then we're okaye again! [he can never bear being mad at me for long] lol. *that's our sulkiness...* but but! after we watched our teleseryes, he had to annoy me again!, with "how are you and..." then "joan, look at your names..." then mom came to the rescue! "enough already lah, it's already over and you still have to bring it up..."

~~
tomorrow's Teacher's Day...i'm ditchin Dover's celebration and go back to CDSS to meet 5/1 fam. weeee! wait~ darling Sab's gonna be sad i left her...awwww! if not fer that SC! you'd be with me and the rest! *ugh*
the upshot of NAFA's here! daaaym! bodyaches...OMG! puhleeeze! i duwanna go back CDSS walking like one old woman but but but...i'm really feeling the pain larrr.
--edits--

after all the sleepless nights and the stress that came with it, i'm finally able to have a break...at least for awhile...
one exam, three tests down, one to go! go Jojo!!! jia you!!!

i'm soooo fagged! MME test yesterday, hahaha, chicken feet, small fly, i close one eye siol! haha, confident sangat la i...okaye per! chiiii...cken! that debarment sheyt was just to scare us sia!

in the end, we all can take the test. nahhhhbeh! good thing i forged, if not, i kena nag! siala!

i slept at 1800, woke up at 0000, slept at 0300 and finally roused at 0600...
NAFA was okaye...at least i think i managed to hit the passing grade uh, i think i'll pass...lol... *confident*
many many much much THANKS to Dave!!! for being blurrrr...instead of running SEVEN fuckin rounds for our 2.4km, i only ran SIX! so that saved me alot! if not i think i fail redi sia! walaoweeiii...i ran with my ipod to keep me focused [like in my own world, ye know...] but i actually just didn't wanna hear the cheers [and jeers?] hahaha.
then i finished running, Sisi told Xin Long i like kewl liddat run/walk with ipod oni...wakakaka...
could've done better, but due to me being too lazy to be lazy...i got the following results: [ ] = passing

situps > 32 [26]
SBJ > 160? cm [?]
inclined pullups > 22 [22]
sit&reach > 36cm [?]
shuttle run > 11.6 sec [13+]
2.4km > 15.48 mins [16.30min]

message to my darling YiJuan, get well and all the best for your NAFA [if you still have to do it?! skali exempted liao lei! HOPE NOT... :P]

anyway, *THIS JUST IN!!!!*
i got a new crush! hahaha! i dunno what class uh! actually i dun care oso! haha. i saw him in the hall doin NAFA oso. lalala. joanne, joanne. tsktsktsk. lerrrr, at least i oni until liddat right!? not until i do something like one minah liddat! fuck sia! that wan all very despo la. i oni see see, never do do. u know u know?! u dunno u shaddap! im so sure you all also liddat! wakakaka.

just now the SC were rehearsing for tomorrow's Teacher's Day event. Wahh, all the minahs dance dance sia. lol. okaye lah, but typical minahs...! hahaha. tsktsktsk. ouh well, we can never avoid such things. whereever the hell you go in singapore will find their kind one lah! i like their music and dance steps only...not their dance and the way they gelek. wakakaka. i'm sooo just kidding...NOT... *bleah* but they are good people anyway. they're only labeled as minahs even if they aren't cuz of how they dress...hahaha. whathefuck right?! i know. haha. i think they purposely lah! so people scared of them. lol. no offense to anyone hor! just my thoughts. haha. my blog anyway...right?! you no like, get the fuck off lah! hahaha.

i sound like i'm looking for trouble redi. skali i go school, all the minahs come after me sia! wakakaka. but too bad, Dover no minahs uh...good! i loooiiike. wahh, liddat then skali i go out of my house all the minahs from dunno where come find me. lol. kla...i can face their fucked up faces. lol. whatthehell.

i got to chit chat wet wet with sabby today! haha!

im sooo singlish today. teehee!

thank you

Thank you

The past few days, I’ve been struggling to think positively about this failed relationship. But today, I finally have agreed and realized that I should be thankful for so many things that have happened in this whole period of time with you.

I admit I have been blinded by love so much so that I’ve neglected so many things; so many people, especially. Before, I was reluctant to share my happiness as well as sadness [BGR] with people; particularly, friends. I was never open about such things because I didn’t trust people enough and I thought they weren’t worth my trust. Watching my friends go through so many failed relationships, and all I did was shook my head and call ‘em idiots. Because they were dumb enough to give in to their partners, not knowing that they were only harming themselves; although they already knew, they still did it anyway. They’d ask for advices but would disregard ‘em. That was the reason why I’ve always hated and avoided such convos with my girl friends. What’s the use of askin for advices when you ignore ’em and would be dumb enough to repeat the same fucking mistake!? Stupid right!? And then I told myself, “I would never put myself into that situation! Ever!”

Well, who the fuck was I to utter such things? Where am I right now?! What did I just go through? Didn’t I just go through [if not the same,] similar situation? I am taking this opportunity to ask for forgiveness to those people I’ve criticized. People tend to be judgmental so I’m only human…

I thank you because you made me experienced this. You made me experience the pain that my friends went through; the pain I thought I’d never go through. I realized now that it’s NOT enough to just imagine or try to be in somebody’s shoes. You have to experience it; only then can you prove to people you’re what or who you say you are and what you will and won’t do. “Actions speak louder than Words”…
I thank you for making me realize that what I thought I would not do, I can and will do. I’ve neglected my friends, close friends, parents, studies and most importantly; my principles and God. The whole time I was with him, I actually got tempted to do [things I promised never to do] as well as forget many things; things that have been my pillars of strength and personality. I couldn’t believe that I could turn away from them all just for someone who isn’t worthy. Hypocrisy is what I’ll call myself. A letdown to myself, my surroundings; family, friends and most especially, God. [I keep repeating myself! Hahaha]

You see, you may be going “Why the hell is Joanne writing such post?! So mawkish. Like as if this is the biggest hardship she’s been through…”
Well, I was never open to people, a restricted person I‘ve been. I didn’t want to show my weaknesses, I guess. But after High School, I’ve grown a little and I’ve learned to open up more. I write it down if not verbally. [Don’t go further if you it doesn’t interest you…]

Over the past few years, I’ve been in many relationships all of which no seriousness were involved. Why? Peer pressure I’d say. Seeing friends having “many boyfriends, so I also must have lah!”…yea, I was like that. Til Sec3, where I matured so much that all those stopped. I thought, “that isn’t my life, that isn’t me…I don‘t have to follow people just to say I’m in!” In fact, having many boifs was never an “in” thing…purely just to show off how “in demand/pretty” you are with boys…whatever?! Hahaha, how dumb… If you lived here, you’d understand what I mean…

Anyway, to calculate since Sec3, 2004, this is the third person I can say I really fell for[really liked, not love]. But this is the only person that made me go beyond my control. It may have not been that extreme for that person, but to compare, it is. I now understand why I have a friend who always talks about the same topic over and over again. I feel you now. I apologize I was insensible before.

Thank you because without this lesson, I wouldn’t have learned the importance of love and always having God in you. I wouldn’t have realized my mistakes too. I wouldn’t have realized that it is not always love. I wouldn’t have realized that it is NEVER love; [not at this age, not for me at least.] Really, it’s just attraction, attraction with feelings. To those who are “loving” now, you don’t have to agree/disagree with me. I’m not asking for opinions but if you want to, go ahead. But do Respect mine as I will respect yours.
I have to love myself again, before I can love someone else.

Having been with many different boys, I’ve seen many different types of guys, many are the same, and only a few stand out. Not that those really count because they were of puppy love but still, you can somehow observe things. To think of it all, I’ve never been in a serious relationship til my last two[i forgot who, lol]. Yet this is the worst.

Hate me, love me, but all I can say is you have underestimated me, in the kind of person I am.

lets get DOWN and derrtehh

sup sup oiiii
teehee!

"you today so happy?"
i was pretty loud today. it wasn't the maximum level yet and already they are telling me i'm hyper...teehee. no freakin idea why! but it just comes. emmm, it's either the environment, or the mood, or the whateverr?

anyway, glad to have made 'em laugh. class is really gett'n boring without jokes around. if there are, [which mostly comes from Es], they'd be lame ~_~" ...
"...and it has been declared, CLASS is HUMDRUM without Joanne!..."
hahha. okaye, i'm being conceited! well, it's how you'd remember me...bring it to your grave yah?! okaye! great!

~~
some funny, waggish, sidesplitting, jaw-locking, muscle-cramping, eye-tearing,

non-stop-hits-of-laughter-thing happened today! hahahahahhahaha! fuck! i couldn't stop, and still can't stop, and probably won't stop laughing!!!
*JOANNE! BEHAAAAAVE* *ahem!*
okaye, got ahold of myself already.
well, my very friendly, unintentionally-comical friend did a stunt that i think no one else could have ever done or would ever wanna do [the person didn't want to, anyway]

*whoops, something just came outta my nose while laugh-typing this, ewww!*

while waiting outside to be let inside the auditorium, we saw a round couch. so i raced for it with friend A, not knowing that the person won't just take a seat.
sooo friend A jumps or rather, dives for the couch and lands nicely. friend B sees friend A and decides to land on friend A. friend B dives for friend A and lands nicely too, EXCEPT that friend A turned [to stand up i guess]...

soooo friend B's destination didn't end on friend A...but...

took a detour and ended on the floor...HARD!

see, this friend of mine never intends to really be funny

but somehow turns out to be one.

The stupid thing is that i didn't help that person out. *uuuggghhh*! i soo hate myself!

anyways, i'm just thankful to have this person around, because we have

gotten closer, [if not for you, me]...through thick and thins, we've been together!

not so lah, but can say lah horrr...lol. this person never fails to make me laugh even with the slightest thing. my sense is humour uh...tsktsktsk...

anyway, i'm serious when i said i'm thankful i've gotten closer to you ;)

always out to help people! i looooiiike!

well, you'll be fine from that fall you had. be careful okaye?! and i will be there the next time, and not just stand/sit there being all unfriendly...
~~

i had Aye Thi whoops i mean 80 for my CMO test :)
pending to take MME [the module that i inadvertently, but Nelson deiberately vetoed me from!] and CMO exam. *gee whiz*

**Nobody can make me INFERIOR without MY consent**
nga loe ma!

oi

hey hey!

okaye, some of you are wondering whose blog was i talking about

[that i recently have subscribed to]...well, it's kaye's...yea...i remember when i first met her. she was so friendly and all smiles and all...hung out a few times. but with one misunderstanding, things didn't go well. lol. so yeap! but she's a good writer i tell you. hi kaye!

lalala. coincidentally, glenn is back! hahaha, MIA larr. ye know, just when things hasn't been goin well, here he comes. but whatever glenny. you still suck! haha! no excuses. and and he doesn't even know that TJR's been hospitalised! and i thought he only stopped communicating with me! until he found out about TJR. lol. if he hadn't read YJ's blog...*sheesh*

oh yes, and i'll see you on friday for Teacher's Day and 5/1 BBQ!

and my GIFT!!!

anyways, belated happy birthday Brendz! [24/08/07]

tsktsktsk

Hey hey!
friday...
Emm, i left home at 8 when my class was supposed to start at 830. lol
gladly, Ms Jo was caught in a jam and would meet us at 9...like gee?! our next lesson starts at 930! well anyways, she cancelled it too so yeap! great?! *sigh*

out of all the lessons we were supposed to have with her, we can like count the number of times she turned up ~_~ [poor-est attendance, tsktsktsk] we all still like her nevertheless.

played baminton with Aye Thee? [i duno how to spell her name], then Sze Min and Ting Long later joined...lalala. then went to chill with the guys at the gym. YJ, Pearlyn and I were also workin out,

though YJ and i were disturbing the guys more, haha.

i got to play xbox!!! mann, 's been ages! great! then watched movie, then tv. then compueter.

so yeah, my eyes can never live without facing the monitor...tsktsktsk. if not the comp, it's the TV.

hahh! but ouh well, good things do come out of it anyway, hehe. what uh? i also dunno...lol, what only!

vision

test...today...siala!!! easy siaaaa!!! i "open-book"! *cheater* as always! lol...
nola...i did my homework okaye! so you jealous people out there, GODAI!

ahakz...did i mention i got 86.3% for cisco test on monday? okaye, i just did =p
it's not that high but yea yea, whatever...lol


~~
hmmm, i don't know...it's pretty daunting...when you have some kind of a special gift...it's nice and cool and all but it can also be a burden if you do not know how to use it and you just keep it to yourself. most probably because what you just saw freaked you out; and telling the others, or the one closest to you, or even to the person who was in your vision would further fluster both you and the person. i don't know if i can handle that if i were to have that gift. i'd most probably just do my best to look out for that person and save 'em without 'em knowing. then they'd either be thankful or they'd find you weird and call you weird...oh well, i'd rather be called weird than having the whole world know my gift [owh wait, i already am weird, hehe]. who knows! some scary people might take me away and isolate me and use me with things they wanna know [in the future], you know!? i don't know...lol...

well, i'm sure there will be a time when you're all set to help the world. most especially your loved ones. *sigh* i wonder..If he had only known how to use it earlier would he have saved his Mom. i've been longing to see and feel my Gramms, Gramps, Unc, and the rest of my relatives who have passed on yet i haven't seen nor felt any of their presences...maybe they think i'm not ready to see them yet. sometimes i really wanna see spirits but i don't think i can take it if i see the bad 'uns...i only wanna see good 'uns...cuz the bad 'uns don't look good...lol...*be careful what you ask for now, jojo* hehe, yeayea, i know...just a thought. but i guess it really is hard for those with special gifts...

we all have our own thang...so yeap! go do your thang cuz JC...you really moved me. well at least you saw her again; and maybe knowing that she's happy now will help you and your fam to move on with life? knowing that she's just there, watching over us...together with Gramms and all.
~~


Uhhuh! so take good care of your loved ones.

[like she always say;]
fighting:)

uhhuh!

hey peepz...

Emmm…
i didn't get to submit my portfolio...lol...
i realised i can't just hand it up like that...

got lotz more to do uh...anyways it's fun fun fun!
the only thing i hate about this module is Nelson anyway...hahaha...

for getting me debarred!!! *uggghh*

i was so craving for the school's chicken chop last night so i gratified my cravings this morning...i can say i'm proud i've improved! Dooode!

i like finished it okaye! [unlike before when i would leave it half-finished!] well, except for the bread and fries which i so wanted to finish up but i couldn't hold it anymore. you know that kinda feeling when you're full although you're not satiated! *sigh*

but oh well...thanks to Aida, YiJuan and Edmund for waiting ;)...Aida noticed i was kinda havin "difficulty" tryin to scoff down the food [my face like one kind liddat!]...i was further conscience-smittened by YiJuan who's been using Jesus' name [which is soooo wrong!] and going "Didn't Jesus tell you not to waste food?", "Didn't Jesus blah blah blah...", "A lot of people starving and you're wasting food..." [not her exact words]

and so on...lalala...whatever YIJUAN...
And and, she and Aida kept annoying me,

mentioning the word "B........" *rolls eyes*
Again! WHATEVER YIJUAN...

back in class, i suddenly had the urge [i’ve been having that urge since monday!] to ask Nelson why he debarred me from the module...[seeing his face sickens me already so i had to ask!] and he said,

"blah blah blah, you debarred yourself…"
"blah blah blah, your attendance is below 75%, blah blah blah..."

Ughh!!! so nottt! lol...won't argue lah! but if i remember clearly, that was like..on the 1st term lah! after the holidays i improved whaaat! whatever sia! i don't like you lah Nelson-fuckson! [lol...exagg...]

Anyway, i was pretty noisy in class today...been kinda disturbing YiJuan alot [sarcastically] and she kept going "Joanne, are you okaye?!", "You don't seem yourself today...", "You must be taking it too seriously" [or at least something like that], "I hate you lah!", "Shut up lah", "You're not my Joanne anymore!!!"

Ughh!!! so nottt! i'm sooo myself okaye! i'm sure you like it! lol!

Towards the end, took some pictures for the Life Skills project presentation...*my face like fuck sia* [as always...kekeke...]

**
Canteen...
YiJuan with her plate of rice and veggie *rolls eyes* [veggie girl] approaches me...

YiJuan: Joanne, you want to drink anything?
Me: Huh? Ouh, i want to drink Whatever...
**

hehe...funny right?! laugh arrrr! bad sia! FUCK YOU! Lame-ass suckkafu!
kaye lah, i have to cram redi! tomorrow test sial!

8 chaps and it's already 11pm!
Ughhh!!!

profile

Schools:
Veritas Parochial School ['92-'96] >> De La Salle School ['96-'01] >> Chestnut Drive Sec ['02-'06] >> ITE College West Dover ['07-'09]

Occupation:
Student

Affiliations:
JESUS, YFC, St. Joseph's Church, Black-White-Pink, BGBG, Clique10, 5/1

Hobbies:
Sound-tripping, Shoppin, Actin, NET-Surfing, TV-ing, Eatin, Sleepin, Dancing, Crayon-ing, Laughing

Interests:
Theatrical Performances, Sports [Baseball, AmericanFootball, IceHockey, FieldHockey, Basketball, Hurdles, Skateboardin, Dirtbikin, Surfin, Wakeboardin, Blading], Acting, Movies [action, action-adventure, adventure-comedy, action-comedy, romance, romance-comedy]

I love:

GOD
Family
Friends
Myself
[trying to love] enemies [if there are]

subscription to boredom

Hey hey! I couldn’t bear not to b-log! Especially when somethin’s up!

Recently I’ve just “subscribed” to someone’s blog and has been a sort-of-avid regular reader then. Someone who doesn’t really like me…[can‘t look at me straight in the eyes…hahaha…which made me dislike the person too…] hahaha…well actually I do admire the personality, but the fact that the person dislikes me makes me sad…awww…lol!
Well, nevertheless I still like the posts…some are humorous…some are serious-sappy-average?!…

But! mostly inspiring…her views in life and all...*oooh, I loooiiike*…lol…

Yep, well, *news flash*…
Well, it’s more of a yesterday’s [Monday =.~" ] news…
I got debarred from Multimedia Essential module exam…
Apparently, Nelson is too blind to see and notice the rest of the students who comes to class way fucking later than me! They come after break! Which is like 10?

Hmmm, that ol’ man must have the hots for me eyy?! Hahaha…what the fuck!? Well, then he shouldn’t only focus on me! That bustard-custard!
Ouh wells, I gots to sign an appeal form…lalala… it’s not like it’s only MY fault…mm-hmm!

Today’s class…emm, it was uberly b-o-r-i-ng!!! here’s why:
Last night, I stayed up til 3-fucking-am just to do my portfolio! [oh yeah, thanks to Thiru and Sam for keeping me company!]
So I saved it in my thumb drive, [along with the sources that I need for my continuation of the portfolio in school] and it ccc-rashed on me! What the FUCK! So I couldn’t do it lah! I didn’t do nothin’ except to laze around and surf surf surf the net…*sigh* ~____~"
Okaye, well…emm, Imma go do my portfolio lah hor…see ya?

AWOL...hehe...

pssst...
i'll be away for a week
cuz i'll be preoccupied with exams, submissions and tests...

so emmm...just skedaddle okaye!!!
hahaha...just kiddin'
i'll see y'all around...
see ya when i see ya...
peace out...lol...

itch

In a state of confusion…
So many things goin on in my mind…
I can’t quite comprehend…

I know not what to do anymore.
I feel like I’ve restricted myself to only doing certain things and that’s it
I can’t seem to move forward with studies and everything

lalala...

geez

Hey hey…
I couldn’t connect to the i-net last night

so I gotta wait for today…
How was your yesterday?

Mine’s okaye.
Went for the Exile gig
Audiocean was fine except for some pitchy errors.
We got sooo bored we sneaked up on his little brother

with a girl only we CDIANS know…
Pretty impish eyy…
We went back to the gig when we eventually lost em both.
Trella band was dope…Bong, the guitarist looks cute!
Some moshing moshing…
After that band, we left…

I’m sorry I can’t help being paranoid.
It’s becoz she’s still skulking around
It’s not that easy you know
Here I am, needing your COMFORT…
REASSURANCE the least…
But all you do is shut up…
It’s as hard for me as it is for you
I know I always bring it up
Because I do not know if you’re keeping things from me
Whatever the hell it is, I hope to one day find PEACE…
Because I don’t feel you’re WITH me…
I’m sorry…

do something...

sigh...

Friday Friday…
Cut class…
Too lazy uh…

But at least I cleaned the house okaye!
Then went out…
T’was Julez-Day today… ''=.=''
Accompanied him to alter HIS freakin jeans
Then went to LP buy HIS facial wash
After which, walked to Meridien to eat cuz HE was hungry
Then shopped for HIS clothes. ''=_="

Sialarrr...boring sia! hehe...

I soooo need to work so I can shop shop shop but I won’t drop.
Eh, duhlings uh…if any of y’all can gimme work for 5weeks, baik uh!
Preferably, F&B uh…so I can eat the food there…wekekekeke…
I know I funny right…
Yala yala whatever!

Puhleeeze! I need cash badly larrr…F&B okaye?! Resto uh…

eerrbuddy in da club gett'n tipseyy

Yesterday was dope…
because because…
I had a great time doing my job!
I wuz sellin sellin…
and and…many were comin comin…
hurhur…

I didn’t get to see the concert in the hall…
The live bands…

well…they suck…
except for the raggae-ska? band…
at least I kinda enjoyed it…
though their intonation…needs more improvement *wakakaka*
Ouh yeah! Khuzaifa was the one wearing red jeans.
Gee…I didn’t recognise him til Askdee approached and told me. *whoooaaa*
[psst! I used to crush on Khuzai…in Pri Skoo uh...

but seeing him again…errr…nahhhhhhh…next please! Hahaha]

Went to CCK to wait for YJ… -___- one hour..
but worth the wait..hehe [and she’d probably say “it should!”]
Was in a hurry to get home cuz cuz I needed to PEE-wee…lalala
but but! the motherfucking LRT was delayed for like 754237283hours! *ugh*
The Kiasus shifted to the other LRT which left later…hahaha!
cuz I think they thought that the LRT on my side was the faulty one.
Aaaanyway, I rested then blahblahblah…

Went to Brendz’ place first then met Julez and headed for Velvet Dragon…
the queue was freakin long but we skipped cuz Arch got us in fast…VIP lah…hehe…
the gals agreed that the Ladies[toilet lah!] was ubber-pretty!
really really... you should go in…if only my toilet was like that…sigh…
Had Vodka and Whiskey…
Best part is I didn’t pay at all…*wakaka*
Lalala…left the place at around 5 to go McD for breakfast…
Headed to Brendz place to get my stuffs then to my crib. Fuck the rain man…
Reached home at 6plus and woke up at 8plus and slept again and woke up at 11...
So much for the alcohol I consumed…I was almost gonna barf but I handled it well.
Arch, B and Julez stopped me already

cuz they didn’t want momma and poppa to go haywire…*lol*
Whate’er that…

I hated my make up though…
I look better without make up on…lalala…hehe…
Okaye I’m sofa king hungry right now I can eat you!
But I won’t...cuz you ain’t yummy enuff… *bleah*

HAPPY 42nd NATIONAL DAY SINGAPORE!!!

[my home!]

DOZY

Doooode!
I
M
Sooo
Gonna take MRT to school EVERYDAY!
Early sia!
Just 20 mins late compared to bus;

which would make me miss class! *lerrr*

Dreamweaver’s cool…
Real cool…
Just like Photoshop
And Sound Forge
And Premiere…
Lalala…

Went for the bloody IC “meeting”…
Reached home at six siool!
First time ever to go home that late from school -___-

Mom made chicken sandwiches…
haven’t had that in a looong time so I guess I missed it…
*chomp*chomp*chomp*



*This just in!!!*
Mom’s naggin at me for;
My messy room,
Not vacuuming,
Filthy toilet,
And basically, not helping her with the chores…
*Ughh!!!*

That’s real infuriating!
We should really get a maid lah!
But they refuse to!
They want us to learn!
Like whatthefuckingfuck!
I’m a busy lady now!
And then too…*lol*
And in the future…*duhh*

Mom went
“You like that how your court gonna like you!”
And all I could do was roll my eyes.
That’s just real fucked up man.
She’s a whiner! Like me! *errrggghhh*

Aight, I should STOP! whining too…

traLala

I’m having my LuNner…
I just had banana
Now I’m havin my main course, Rice with Chop Suey
Lalala…
Baby woke me up that’s why!
I was having a wonder-weirdful dream when
I heard my phone go “tennen-tennen-tennen” *waleoooo*

Okaye…my class started at 9am and
I was still LATE! Whatthemotherfuckingfuck!?? *hurhur*
Lalala…
I give up lah…
But uh! Esther say egg-jam cannot be late le…must be there ½h before…
I’ll still try! Nono…I’ll DO it…cannot give up…it’s like givin up my dream!
Wahh, cannot imagine lerrr…k lah…pretty nonsensical post…

I’m just bored and my fingers wanna type…

Cya…

sunday mass

A pretty lonely Sunday
Dad went to work
Arch went back to camp
And a few hours later, Mom went off to work too…
Leaving me all alone…
Which was a good thing!!!
*hurhur*
I got the house all to meself *evil laugh= muhwa-hahahahaha!!!!*

Ok lah!
I vacuumed
I bathe
I left
Met Julie-an :)
Picked up my skirts
Attended mass
Bumped into ate Tina
Had dinner all together at BPP
Waited for her to be done with her groceries then headed home

I remembered I had to do Cisco!!!!
But too late liao le! So the sway hor?!
Nemer-mai one lah horrr…fail fail me no care…
Hurhurhur!!! Jowk jowk jowk!!!

K lah! It’s almost 0000 hours…must hit the sacks or else baybhie get anggery! Waleooo…
G’nyt peepole!

have u really?

Hell-err…
I woke up at 8today. *stunned* O_O
Didn’t know what to do the whole day til he asked me

to join them at Vivo.

Still a lil uneasy, but I’ll probably catch up soon.
Walked around then had lunch then headed to

Marina Bay fer steamboat.
‘Twas okaye. Pretty bloated.
Dad and I picked Mom up while Arch sent Brendz home.
Glad we took a cab cuz I couldn’t fucking walk no more.
That’s about my Saturday.

I so fucking get hurt every time I see or hear HER name.
I don’t know what to do anymore.
I just feel I’m not good enough…
or that no one can ever replace her in your heart…
Sometimes I think I made the wrong moves.
But I still wanna give it a try.

Only because I have regained my feelings for you.
Do you?

hmmm

TGIF!
Lalala. Yess yess, it's fuggin Friday yow! And I have no plans yow.
Well, not really that allowed to go out at night…so yeah.
But but at least in the day can go out mah…
But but! Still no plans =[

School was fine…
Didn’t have Life Skills class today cuz Ms Jo Ong was busy with the
Nat’l Day sheyyt so we just chilled at the Canteen…
During PE, went to street soccer court…
The gals, YJ, Aida, Atiqah, Izza and I stayed at the Bball court to chill.
YJ and I “cloud-tanned” while we chatted about
random sheyyt; waxing, eyebrow threading, puberty, etc?!
Went for Inspire Club meeting and and we already got a job for this Wed’s event.
Dooode! I’m in-charge of the Choco Fountain selling marshyymallows…lalala.
Y’all should come me stall yow!
But but, if you all don’t want also can la. I can use my power to seduce y’all!

Got home…
Slept in the aft til 5
Then went to Bangkit to have me skirt altered…
The fucking uncle said $8 and I was a little surprised.
I remembered Ros teaching me to bargain…so I said,
“Eh uncle uh! $6 can or not uh!?”
Then he say “can.”
But uh, I think right! $4 can…wahhh fushit la…

Ugh!!!
Fucked up…
I got no more dough y’know.
I’m broke again larrr…
*sigh*…I’m gonna have to save up again for people’s gifts…
Like OMG! I hate that!
Lalala…okaye I’ve got nothing else to say…

bloody blisters

Lalala…I was early! Cuz I took 963E, teehee.
Lesson lesson.
Lei lei today so emo leiiii…
At the lab, let YiJuan feel me upper abss…tahha. I’m succha braggart!!!
Lalala…

Anyway, chilled at CP with baby.
Then went back to his new place to grab his “merchandise”.
Didn’t wanna go in…but but Mommy Ella called me in

so I went in and “kirim salam” then we left.
I saw his Dad at the void deck then “kirim salam” also lorr.
Chilled at CP again for his puff before boarding the bus.
Singin singin on our journey.

Then then walked through Bangkit Market to the LRT station to head for

Greenridge SC to chilli chilli.
My new shoes were killin me…
On the way home, I gave up and

sweet baby took off his sleepers and let me wear it,

then he carried my shoes til the lift; walking barefooted.

And then and then I had to kiss him g'bye…

Awwwww…

Lalala…
Congrats to Brigid and I…

Wed-mad-nessday

Today, the earliest day we were supposed to go school, 745am,

and I actually only took a bath at 610 and reached at 830...

I usually have my bath at 530.

Okaye, whatever that…

Reached school, went to the hall, couldn’t find my class so I thought of going to the “washroom” and will somehow manage to find it!

Hahaha, y’all'll be thinking,

“Go toilet find your class? Your class in the toilet ar?”

Spotted Nelson and asked where the class is, he pointed and when I was headin for the class, Mr Gremar [my KABABAYAN yo!!!] and Sab pulled me in to join their class, “You come my class, you today from 1A” So I was like, Otayee! Her class boys reminds me of 5/1...the “togetherness” I saw in ‘em made me feel “at home”…
I looked to my left, and noooo, I didn’t wanna go there! Haha! No, I’m not a hypocrite of 1D, just that, they aren’t fun enough lah! Maybe if they start jumping around like crazy monkeys with bananas in and on? their mouths I’d be happy to go there. A.T saw me singing crazily along with Sab and she kept smiling and laffing. Teehee, I think she wanted to join lah, hehe. I could see she can be the hyper type.
I looked behind and noticed the stagnant atmosphere with only our side active =_=" These people can’t go to a fucking Rock Concert cuz they’re so deaddo; worst than Zombies! I’m talkin about the inactive students okaye! What a pity lah. And I thought those naughty guys would probably be the loudest, screaming their heads off, singin the NDP songs.

Bahh, just don’t ever mix me with these kinda people.

I’d be dead within seconds. Talala…’nuff said.

After the “rehearsal”, had break. Had chicken chop again that I left unfinished. The rest finished it so fast! and mind you, they ate later than me! I hate to say this, and you’re prolly gonna laff when I say

I TOLD YOU SO! My throat is just fucking SMALL!!! Lalala…

No lesson today, Nelson just gave us assignment! We hafta sketch our ideas for the this thingy uh. Creating blogskin using Dream Weaver. Dooode, I’ve been like waiting fer this momentoow, yo! I wanna create my own template! As in from sss-cratchhh…it’d be the coolest thing ever. Because because, lalala. I am so gonna be EARLY for school next Tue and Wed! I can’t afford to miss a few minutes. Tahha, I’m exxag-ing. I’m not at all as excited and eager as I actually sound here.

Tweee…see what words can do…propaganda baby! Lalala…

I am actually falling in-love again. It’s my feeling now, today. Cuz my feelings usually changes as fast as I blink! Lalala…but yes, I really am right now. Just before that, I was feeling insecured again.

Tell me, whaddafuck is this! Can’t I have a steady mood and feeling? Lalala. It’s better this way lah, actually.

JKLM! You suck doode!

Hahaha, just kiddin. I like you… =>