ouh yeah. i forgot to tell yous, on thursday, when i came late to school, i was somewhat proud to be one of the many to watch the airbus fly fly to sydney - on tvmobile, ahee. i was plannin to ditch school on that day to go to the airport but didnt bother to coz i already skipped school on wednesday, so what the hell, my plans always get screwed. ahaha. i remember watchin the makin of the A380 months ago. a really strenuous, gruesome work that finally paid off, *phew*. those ganchiong ones who cancelled orders, too bad. haha. no patience right! nehneh-nee-poopoo! bluueeeeeekkkk! ahakz.

~~
a boring halloween for me. doughless to party! id never spend my savings nor ask my folks coz it was never my habit to just ask, for my own pleasure. yeahyeah, call me thrifty and all, im just being frugal. besides, it aint me own money, hardwork or sweat. ouh well. instead of partyin with the clubbers, i went to a kiddie party; a seven-year-old party! ahee. a humdrum though! i was like -_-"
but at least my primary school close mate, miao de spotted me, so it was fun catching up with him. lotssa youths raya-ing, sheesh. chilled with this boy in baju kurung then bumped into javz O_O at a bustop, then isham too in the lrt @_@! geez, didnt even bump into any gals i know, haha. well, thanks for the time, doode.

~~
hmm, its so nice to hear im being missed. yesyes, i miss you all too. i think thats whats good, yknow. like you, rarely seeing people, cuz then theyd miss you more than them always spending time with you, cuz itll just bore em? yah.

~~
and my dear friend, for a guy, youre so fragile. i guess that is why i never fell for you because youre worse than a girl, haha. nope, im not mocking you, i am just making you sturdier. but youre too pessimistic to even get the drift. you say youll change but i guess youll never and i cant do nothin bout that. i just wish you the best doode. but really, you cant dwell on things all the time; no wonder youre like that. and of course, like i said three years ago, i will be your friend. its what ive been doin ever since, but youre not helpin yourself. i gotta bear with your being a mangina over your ex-galfriend and i still am[tolerating], but my ears are really gettin retarded from all that same ol story of yours. but ouh well, nevertheless, im still here for you, i just hate the fact that you arent helping me help you help yourself! and youre always trying to expect. and...i can go on but hah! you already know what i mean. really, just get a grip.

~~
im thankful for the people who really love me bcoz im like fuckingly weird! haha! what the fuck. and yes i love you too. really i do. okaye! but dont take it the wrong way. i love you not only because you love me for me but i love you too because i love you. awww. aint that shuuuweeetzzz! ahakz. i know. and yes, imma wait for the freakin day we both can be totally free and you gonna take me for a drive round the island! i fuckin missed that like fuck! and aww, i miss "fuck"-ing too, haha! sheez. what? do i wanna chill with you? ouh, fo shizzle mah doozzle cuz i mizzle you like fuzzle! cmon! lets gezzle the fuzzle outta hezzle! aheeheehee!!!

heat it up

pissed at mahself for missin 3classes on wed.
stewfeed menses gotta come at the wrong time!
tried crawlin outta the sack but the spasm turned me down and buried me in bed.
hooe well.

~thur~
went to lunch at clems after VB class, rowben joined us. went back for jpi lesson only to find out that instead of a 2.5hrs of lesson, we only had 1h and it wasnt a lesson; purely babbling moment for us, ahee.
was a lil bugged when ms suryani asked for volunteers for a something next thursday and when no one did, she looked at the IC members and was sort of forcing us. when she finally talked me and aida out of that sheyt, we gave in. -_-" i was really not sincere. but when she got 4boys from the other class, she finally let us go. becoz she found out that were gonna be missin mr soongs class and she knew soong wouldnt let us go. now thats a breather! i didnt volunteer cuz id miss a lesson. and nuh-uh. ive always hated missin lessons! especially this sem.

anyhow...went home with juan, lei and aids. aids and i were initially talkin bout our grossy childhood stuff; poo, earwax, mucus, etc. hahaha! well, mostly mine! haha! then we four had a convo i never had in a long time, hahaha! a topic me and clique10 would always end up with; sex. ahh, well, twasnt much of a sex topic, ahee. but yea. i dont know who started it though. suddenly juan said that those with periods tend to get horni-er?! i doubt so cuz i wasnt! and if i was, i wouldve told you i was, you freak!

didnt wanna blog but im really bored out of my gourd, just gotta type somethin out!


nurdz! i wanna play with your bike! since last sem man!
lee, whenya bringin me out man!

for you i will

i
dont
feel
like
blog
ging
period

tee
hee
;)

embrace the moments

♥Happy Birthday Lola Jovita♥
Happy Birthday Tita Alice
Happy Birthday Tito Albert

patience

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENNDY!

hmmm...again, it was brought up by mom after brunch.
it started with me sharin bout how my friend whos in MI and i are gonna somehow meet in uni around the same time; because hes graduatin on the end of 2009 while i, on april 2009. hes goin ns before uni while i, poly then uni. i then mentioned how ns was a somewhat disadvantage for guys. and suddenly she just blurted how careless i was wasting time and money [me being in ite that is]. that pissed me so i "defended" myself and told her that if i was literally really wasting time and money in this two years in ite, then what would become of me later? isnt that an "even more" waste than "it already is"? so she meant that me being in ite is a waste of time and money? so what about the knowledge im getting? the things im learning now? am i wasting my time doin all that? i really am making full use of my time and money in ite yknow. i admitted that yes, i became over confident in sec school and somehow my overconfidence brought me here in ite to teach me to keep my feet on the ground even if i do well at certain times. you see, mom always has high hopes for me. and just because she was used to me always doin well, rarely makin mistakes [in general], that it is so hard for her to accept that ive fallen. since pri school, she knew i could excel but i didnt because of my overconfidence. sometimes it makes me think if shes ashamed of me being in ite. sheesh. i know before, i told myself i will not step into ite because i know i could do better than going there but when i got here, it changed my views of ite. yea, all the secondary students and teachers and the whole singapore think that ite is that bad because of the people who are in it. i agree, i somewhat dreaded comin here because of peoples characters that we all mostly see in public. but there arent any of such here in dover and im grateful for that. i dont know about the other campuses but here in dover, the people i see arent the people i expected to be, because here, they have hopes of moving forward. now thats what gave me a chance to get up again. ite is not bad at all if thats what you people think.

well anyway, on the contrary, i do know what mom meant by wasting time and money. she is afraid that we may not be able to graduate from uni because they cannot promise that they will still have their jobs at that time. yes, we are permanent residents here and yes, they both have pretty good jobs but i know, we are still foreigners. meaning, they can still hire a local rather than keeping them because they prioritize their citizens. i know that. its what fears me too. and the thought of me working to save some money so i could somehow help them isnt in their favour because as much as possible, they dont want me to work while i study and if i work, theyd rather i be in office than serving people. geez. so really, what choice do i have? at this point i dont know. but well see when im done in ite. perhaps itll help me get a better job, i have no idea what kind but yea.

i know i wasted my time that i have to be demoted rather than promoted which really cost more but if support is what i get, then maybe itll help so much more. i know youre just concerned but you should really try to be more optimistically concerned.

growin up

ya know, i have always noticed how fashion is so in fashion. whereever. and how people go gaga over whats in this season, whos wearin em, where to get em, how to get em and whatnots. i dont know. ive always been the dull, simple gal; baggy pants/jeans-tee/tank-sneakers. i dont really like change. my styles always been the same since young. and that really does reflect alot in my life; just a few changes but most are still intact. like before, i used to be very materialistic. but ive outgrown that, i dont care bout whats the latest, what i should get, etc, i learned to be contented with the things i have and keep it for as long as possible and not always go after the newer ones. its kind of a lil buggy whenever i see people talkin bout whats new, haha. not that i have anything against them; already i am living with someone as such [a brother that is]; so how worse can it get with the outsiders right? i dont care what people think of me. like when i shop, i still go for the similar things. i think the thing that really bothers a person is the trying-to-fit-in attitude. i may have been one back then, we all have. but once you start to be wise and start finding your true self and then youve settled down with that, youre gonna chuckle atchaself, then shake ya head. getting out of your thought-to-be "comfort zone" and actually finding your real, own comfort zone, will let you see the humongous difference.

its just real funny how i still know some who even put boys in their list of being in their "fashionable life". sheesh. they may not notice it at all unless you observe the pattern, contemplate. ouh, heres the thing, many think im a playa; havin many boys, a flirt kinda gal but they always get surprised when they get to know me. i was never the kind who gives out her number to any guy who wishes to get to know her; the most id do is give my e-add. the word "date" kinda makes it sound serious...hmmm, go out with. yea, going out with guys isnt that bad as long as both parties know what each others intentions are, so there wont be any bad blood between the two later; which is what i usually do - send my message across very clearly at first so no lead-ons will follow. goin out with different boys is no biggie, really, as long as you give em a clear message. the biggie is if, you go out, you hook up, say you love em then dump em or u get dumped, then find another one, without any clear message and the whole thing repeats. see, i dont like lead-ons; if the person confesses and its not mutual, i tell the person straight "its not gonna happen" and well stay as friends, which we actually do, and the friendships strong til now. its why i have many close guy friends who really respect me. i dont get into a relationship i dont think will work out with that person in the long run, even if ive strong feelings for that one, i think before i move. although i failed in my last relationship, heehee. ahh, for that one, i picked the wrong one. but i mean to say generally, among the other guys. so i picked the wrong one, which is also good because the rest are already a totally an-impossible-thing-to-happen but at least, our friendships are still intact.

so its pretty flatteringly annoying how people can be judgemental and think of you as someone youre totally the opposite of. and so to the judgemental people, get your facts right, before you judge, ask straight to the face and dont do it behind the back [unhealthy yknow!]. when i post something judgemental, i post with long-observed-evidences which means weeks/months/years-long, not hours/2-3days-long.

stay happy people ;)

deep inside

i miss my bestfriend, tasha. emmm, should i actually say former? hmm. yea. but no doubt, i still love her. even if we dwindled [we both know that], shes always been my loved one and still is. i dont mind that were not as before, as long as i know i still care for her. awkwardness is what we both felt but yeah. i still love her, really. heehee!

she used to be this cute chubby kid that when she smiles, shes like so fun to hug! hahaha! though when she got older, she got sexier. she aint that cute kid no more! hahaha! im not dissin her! im just sayin. ouh, i remember, we tried to match my bro and her sis, tierra which by the way was from cdss drama too! ahakz. thats really how we started out. yeah. good times.
and remember, ill always be here for you still.
i love you!

teehee, im just happy (:

samson!

hello philippines and hello world!
*whoops* wrong! wrong!
hello singapore, hello world!
ahihihihi! the ever famous greeting by toni gonzaga in pinoy big brother reality tv show! hmmm, wonder when singapore will have the big brother and the dream academy shows. probably soon lar. cuz the two, together with deal or no deal are all created by endemol. so yeah! lol.

i am sooo long winded.

anywayyyyyy! thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you *pants* thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you *phew* to my favvy! for the coookiees!!! omg! seven different types, so the many varieties of cookies! ahihihihi! so the artistic! hahaha! so the colorful. so the hardworking! so the generous. so the woah!!! hahaha! im speechless liao. *exagg* lol! thank you again! im so the grateful lar! u see, small thing can make me happy already! what more if i get something a lil bigger than that? gee. my thank yous will prolly overflow the whole universe. hahaha!

nah, really, i am grateful for so the many many things. the past few weeks have just been heavenly for me. although there are sad happenings; that doesnt involve me but the people around me, the blessings and joy that im getting still topped the sad uns. shouldnt it always be like that? this is what ive been waiting for, few weeks ago when i was just filled with angst. and now that its arrived, im just relieved and gratified and im lovin each second that passes. no regrets about the unhappy moments because its what strengthens us all. being optimistic is whats keepin
me up and alive and kickin. im still hyped up like fuck like that! harharhar!

surprises

BOOYAH!!!!
first of all, id like to thank abang fir for last mondays raya-cookies and fridays treat too! and tufha for the cookies too! wee!!! alright. and my neighbor for the cookies too and im still waiting for another - for the cookies too! haha! cmon bebeh! give em to meh! ahakz! kiddin. i love treats! theyre so fun! like fun-fun!
first week of second sem, fun! like fun-fun! lol. whatevah!

ya know, i was pretty ecstatic on friday that when i got home to nap, i didnt know that at that moment when i was feeling ouh-so-fine, people were screeching and squealing, running for their lives; glorietta2 had an explosion. it was a heart-wrenching moment the moment i received a message from dadda. i suddenly remembered aunt tere and her boutique. and then i got relieved when i remembered that she was located at glorietta4. but, sigh! its still pretty astonishingly unbelievable to really hear of such. like, i could still recall how i would always take a stroll in that beautiful mall. and suddenly, *poof* a part of it, ka-boomed! like dayyyym! i spent like a month in that mall everyday, cuz i was always with aunt, tending her shop, but mostly walkin around, gettn to know the damn bloody big mall. sigh. and just two days after the explosion, sunday, a fire broke out in a resto at glorietta4! aww-mahh-gahh! luckily it was at second floor. hmmm, why glorietta mall? geez. that wasnt the first time. years ago there was an explosion there too. sheesh. what is wrong with you people? really bored eh? nothing to do? wanna rebel? haiz. if you wanna rebel, please dont involve the innocents mann! like really, thats just lame! lol.

what a waste because i think the phils is never gonna rise over poverty. because of corruption. because of greed. sad. there are millions and trillions of filos who have great dedications of rising up because there are truckloads that are talented and really hardworking but all these hopes of soaring are wrecked because of the greedy users. there are politics whereever you turn to. because of all these, people are forced to do stupid things they never wanted to do; crimes. sheesh. dont the govt ever wonder how imprudent they are? how selfish? avaricious? they always talk about how filos should get together and be ONE and all when they never really keep their promises in the first place, in the end, they only think about gettin rich themselves. sheesh! dont they pity those filas abroad working as dh? many filas turn to dh bacuz they have no choice but to leave home just to feed their fam. many do not know that these filas are almost done with college! if not for the lack of money to pay for their last few semesters, they wouldnt need to do such things. but bacuz of the need to survive, they suck up their pride and are forced to enter such jobs, which many people take advantage of; being mistreated. sad.
and gawsh, i actually couldnt believe when i got to know that glorias dads time of presidency, phils was actually doin well, like really well and was even known as "The Incorruptible". but geez, dunno what happened to the daughter. like awww. sad. itd be a miracle if one day there will be another incorruptible president.

ahh, well. im grateful im far away from the messy place though my love for my own people will still stay intact. and i do sympathize them for havin to live with bad people! sheesh! like! really! hahaha! from cookies to explosion to politics! ahihihihi. how randomly linked. teehee! ive always hated politicians. the bad ones!

boys...

currently: CRAVING
craving for: fried mee siam!

ahahha! you know huwaat!? i just remembered the times i was at fida's crib. and the part that i was eating mee siam made me crave. heres the thing: i didnt know the name so i had to ask kawans and as if i wasnt satisfied enough, i went to google it! and then i saw it! OMG!!! lol. so the that one lor. but yea. whenever i crave for something thats pretty impossible for me to get at that point of time, id google it c(= teehee!

that aside, been back to school! 2nd day, cuz yesterday was holiday cuz of hari raya i think. werent suppose to have classes on monday too but they couldnt inform us earlier. lol.
so yeah, new sem, new lecturers, new modules, new timetable. pretty fun! gotta admit, the 5-week break did really nothing good to me; rusted my brain only! wahleooo. well, i know i will get sick of school anytime soon, even if im all excited now and how much i am looking forward to learn more, teehee. i will only get sick of school when i finally am lost in my studies or i just cant catch up oooor yarrr. like that. lol.
in school, there are two filo lecturers, and this sem, mr gremar is takin us! kool. he speaks funny singlish; i mean his pronunciation, teehee! like like like! when he speaks, he speaks like a thai or vietnamese or burmese or cambodian?! lol! he doesnt speak filo-english! like, really. haha! like his accents got the whole mix of those thai, etc, with fillish and adding some singlish; lah, lei, lor, mah, meh, etc. ahihihi! besides him being a joker, youd already laugh at his accent before he even cracks a joke. lol. okaye, i dont know how that sounded to ya but yea, i fooind it ha-la-ri-yes! ok lar! lol! funny me! am i funny? lol, whatever.
im just happy to be back in school and asking people favors, most especially abang firdaus! ahihihi!

the timetables not as beautiful as the first sems but im kool widdit, kinda miss leaving late from school. i just hate peak hours, really. emm, second day of second sem and ive been a good girl, doin some practices unlike before where i just totally put everything aside, ahahahaha. i am not that of a geek as i was in pri school. haha. everything fell apart when i came to CDSS. lol. lalala. never mind, im catchin up!!! yeah baby! aight! im just STOKED! really! hahaha.

best friend

somehow, i still pine for the good ol times,
and at times, i still ask,
where did i go wrong, i lost a friend.
ill be frank, and if ever you ask me this,
ill still say,
i b-lame you for doin that.
but i still acknowledge you because you transformed me;
the way i look at friends arent alike as our times.
i never had another "best" because when i think what best really means,
i can never see anyone being that best enough for me;
where i could just let e-v-e-r-y single thing out;
even my deepest, darkest secret.
ive stopped believing i could still find a best friend,
bacoz you gave me that trepidation of being neglected and maybe even betrayed.
there are close friends - and ever since then,
that has already made me be gratified.
it is safer aint it?
not that i dont open up to em,
i do.
and i have confidants.
just not a best friend.
because i do not tell em every thing - like how id tell a best friend.
if i could clearly recall,
all these happened when we separated.
im not dwelling -
its just that whenever i think about our bubblegum younger times,
i cant help but to also dredge up what the fuck happened after that.
i doubt we can ever bring that back,
because perhaps weve both changed and its left a big gap.
but like i said,
youll still be a part of my life as youve always been,
bacoz youve taught me to be like this.
and i love you for that.
i just hope when our paths cross again in the near future,
we can be best friends again,
even for just that moment, with just that little brief hug.
and here ill tell you,
even if things are way too different for us both now,
i still love you like that.
ill always be here forever for you.

enjoy!

selamat hari raya serta maaf zahir dan batin kepada semua.

alright, greetings to all the muslims there. enjoy your celebration!
dont forget my cookies!? leave some for me and label the container "joanne". and then wrap in a hari raya wrapper if got uh, then see me in school then give me. and if can also, my green packet! teehee. im just kiddin! but i want the cookies larrr...
i love you people.

Belated Happy 18th to al-amin!
Happy 18th to aishah!

catching up

its so...sheesh @_~

classes on mon starts at 1300. its prolly a good thang cuz then me no have trouble gettn me tush up to get ready for school and always is-ku-wee-zing myself into the lrt then mrt. like geeez man! and also i dont have to smell people's bed-smelling body or hair or actually even both ~_~ OH! and onion-armpits too! *vomits* ahihihihihi. on the contrary, i have to actually still experience that on the way home, peak hours. like OhsoMyFuckingGee...im really just not used to this kind of life. hahaha! righhhht. ouh well, i guess that is life. what more when i start work?! ugh! butbutbut i think that'll be in a few years away, sooo, no worries?

lol. my folks dont really want me to work ALTHOUGH they expect me to actually know how working life feels like. gee!? how to when i havent experienced it myself. its just like they dont want me to have ligaw-ligaw [courtship] but they expect me to know how it feels like. they're so weird! like me. haha. no offense, butbutbut i feel like theyre not good at parenting! hahaha. like i feel like they refuse to adjust to their parenting style now that were pretty big anuff. ouh well, never mind that. i dont even know why that came up. oh! i know! its cuz they still treat us like babies! yarr! haha. tsktsktsk. but they expect us to act like matured kids. teehee. theyre sooo funny.

i was keraving fo spag last night, so i told mah pretty momma to buy the thingies and prepare everything and ill just do the cookin, harhar. i dont know what to talk a-bout annie-more. i hate this week cuz its the last weeeeeek of b-reak! i know ive ranted about that bafore. just... i really hate it! dammet! sembreak should be more than five weeks! ugh! it should be a year! haha. okaye, whatever that. theres just really nothing better fo me to say. im just typing crap cuz i feel like it. and donchu dare! uhhuh.

ive gone out with almost everybody, except for a group of people, mainly the chestnutters. gee. haiz. whatever. haha.

grateful

goodnight world.

*smiles*

coming! coming!

if one day i have to leave,
i only want to say, thank you.
please do not anticipate everything to be
the same again when im back,
not unless you want me to feign,
which will only make everything shoddier.
i am still somewhat-terrified of what may happen.
i do not like the words you divulged
because i feel you arent even certain when you expressed that.
im not taking any more ventures
and no more investing,
for it is so over, period[.]
i dont want to be duped again
though i still care.
yet my concern is only limited to, as a person,
no more than that,
not even as a chum.
youre still a someone in my life,
for you have left a very big, rather deep mark in me,
throughout the years,
which makes it tough for me to just erase the dreadful moments.
but because weve also shared the good times,
the unpleasant ones arent enough for me to just abandon us.
i will not try,
i will do my best.
thank you.

~~silly-me~~
aww, so cute, haha! butbutbut, that was from the veryvery, bottombottom, insideinside, deepdeep, you-cannot-see-one-confirm-guarantee-with-chop of my heart! i know! im like shuuuweeeet like that. cuz im dank thats why. and you like right? i know...not. bluek! hurhurhur. and puhleez, do not relate this to yourself just bacoz you think its about you, shameLESS you! harrharr.

haiz. im missing people. need not mention names, i think its mutual. you miss me, i miss you. but i think most of the time, its just YOU missing me, without me missing you back. ahakz. yarr, dont argue because i will not care cuz i n-e-v-e-r care.

for now, i WISH that someoneS will bring me Hari Raya cookies. i miss ros and ree and i-dont-know-who-else for sharing their Raya food with Joanne. ahakhakhak. hmmm, maybe i will give yall christmas cookies too. but too bad there aint such things for me. harhar. but maybe larr!

okaye, i L-O-V-E the weather tadday, so sunny, perfect for beach-ing. i just dont strip to bikinis thats all, because i dont have a hawtt-enuff body to flaunt. and i dont swim either bacoz, one, i dont like the ground, got the that thing arr...and two, i cant swim that well. but i CAN swim okaye! shut up you!

and okaye i will mention some of the people i miss but of whom actually, terribly miss me more than i miss em, teehee. deedee the big momma dino, feeda the crazy not-little-but-big sempret, ros the i-dont-know-how-to-describe-you-for-now but i love u, sabby the little-but-big-that-one makcik, emmm, lee the big guy, wan my crush haha, samster the nicest boy in town, thiru the whatever [you and sab were talking about me! yesterday!!!! hmphh!], ree the ass-i-also-dont-know-why-i-called-you-that, okaye, if i go on, i will fall asleep. but yes i miss more people aside from these mentioned 'uns. and yes i truly am the shameLESS daughter-of-a-not-beytch. im SAD because i didnt get to see the pizza delivery boy just now bacoz i was hooked by my show, shatewpid! i am crazy-dancing now.

yeahuh-uhhuh-uhhuh

hell-er...gewd emmm...mownen.

sigh. my bedtimes ruined again. i gotsta keep adjusting! sigh. ive been sleeping around 12-1am to 3-4am everyday til 630am yesterday. then i woke up at 12. gawsh. i cant keep doin this cuz classes are gonna start on monday and i just dont wanna go to school lookin all shabby, like gee. sigh. how sad. plus im havin ulcer too ;(

okaye, like sooo whatever that...i so totally remember something. ive been wanting to say this, but't just keeps slippin off my mind. sheesh! okaye, whenever i see papa piolo, only one person comes to my mind, "nurhazwan bin i-dont-know-what", lol. everytime i watch piolo pascual on tv; the way he speaks, acts and laughs and not fergett'n, looks is just like hazwan. awww, how cute right?! piolo pascual is like [if not all], almost every filo gals' dreamboy...or man rather. lol. andandand. hazwan is the closest piolo i have. hahaha! but the only thing is, no hes not my dreamboy. hes just my ultimate crush when comes to appearance. or maybe the crushest of my crushes. hahaha. coincidentally, he texted me a few hours ago. ohmyfuckingGee. like i really miss those days. i mean, who the hell wouldnt crush on a boy like him? hes a gentleman, he was from NCC, and he was a jock! [captain of the soccer team!] but the fact that i like him being a sweet-talker, its what disgusts me on boys who are like that. haha, here i go again. but nah, im just stating how similar he is to piolo; looks-and-being-a-gentleman-wise at least. im like so kilig-to-the-max. haha. okaye, stop it! ok, some statistics. today alone, in the span of 3hours; 2300-0200, 3lovely guy friends o'mine asked about my status, in total of 5days, 4boys and a gal. the most coincidental thing is this 2people, askin that same question within an hour. and the best thing is...

well,heres a coupla pics of piolo. u can find hazwans at my friendster. tahha, like youll even bother!

*bom chicka wah wah*

you miss me ;-)

stabilizer

kaye, fuckheaddds! u misssssed me and still are missin me. otayye! ive put[ted] back the flashbox liao lerr. haiz. troublesome! lazy put back yknow! but i forced myself! see, so hardworking like that!

im g-lad its over for my feren. go sammo! weeee! hahaha.

imma say byebye to lappy tomorrow i think. cuzcuzcuz imma send it to hospital. its injured both physically and internally. haiz. ergo, imma have to use dad's or kuya's comp. so sian lor. not mine then i feel weird. i know nuts about computers; cant fix mahself andandand to think im taking IT. haha! how dumb like that! but nah, im sending it for service cuz one of the keys is emm, sort of pecah cuz i was trying to pull out something that got stuck inside, thenthenthen my ever-careless-super-fucking hands and fingers o'mine just did their wonderful work of always-spoiling-things; like fuck like that! geeez! shteeeeeewped!
oh, bloody hell.

i miss arch! and mom and dad! teehee. my neverending misses. i miss arch! just miss pissin him off then bringing me gifts. haiz. oh bummah! SHAKA!

*bom chicka wah wah*

no sheyt

*bom chicka wah wah*

fuck im like hyped today...wakakaka, *do the hyphy movement! go dumb dumb!* dont ask why cuz i dont know why. i also asked myself why. but but myself said i dont know so i will also tell you i dont know. ok, shut up!

heeee, mustve been the moments. awww. like how suweet! and kiut! and lovaly! geez, speaking of which, one day, id like to be in the lovapalooza. like dayyym! ill b-ring mah girlf-riends to the phils and and and yah...im sure yall will enjoy the smoochy-woochy-gucci time! lol. but but but ill make sure im all self-reliant. yarrr. care to join me? okaye! lets go. teehee. im talkin c-rap. its just the effect of that thang. tahha. wanna t-ry? then come 'ere.

okaye lar. i was missin someones. but now its gone. so i dont care. haha. like whathefuck. i know. shut up okaye! haiz. i cant wait to see the look on my face when i see yous. ouh well, itll come. lol. im not an expressionist. my facell prolly still be dull like that -_-, like gee. and then youll be like ~_o? like sheesh.

okaye, have a safe f-light jiggoz! and to all my f-riends who have been real f-riends, thank you. and to those who have not been, fuck you. haha! im just kiddin yall. but there is a lil truth about that. wakakaka. bah! i will still miss your fucking asses, no matter good or bad, so no worries. i still love yall like i love me. keekeekee. hmm, im just happy... *shala-la, its so nice to be happy, shala-la, evrybody should be happy, shala-la* ugh! im havin a major breakdown here. *teet*teet*teet* *c-rash* *BOOOM*

dah lah, joweyn! harhar. its the joy of joys. is that correct?! gee. i wonder...whatll happen. i shant think so much now. i may just get all shabby. and you will just say im eeky. then id say fuck me. and youd come kill me. okaye, that was nice! SHAKA

*bom chicka wah wah*

reaching

hmmm, ive been at my best for the past two days. my sound trip; from indie to hiphop to psychedelic to praise and worship. it feels good to actually be back on track. and i miss YFC buttloads. its been 5-6years. i miss the fellowships, the gatherings and the paise and worships. i miss ate juvz and co. we made four songs back then, though i only remember the tune of one song, You Are. sigh. how time flies.

its a wonderful thing for me that the ire in me is almost gone. although we all know the things we go through have reasons behind em, we cant help but to have feelings; anger, sadness, happiness, etc. as of now i dont feel any anger for the person, although i wont deny that the thoughts still haunt me and the pain still there, it wasnt as extreme as before when all i could feel was rage and the thought of harming. i lifted it all up to Him through prayers. time and prayer has done the works for me. and im g-lad.

its that small thing that makes it all big

i have to be honest, i read bianc's blog everyday and shes one of the people i really look up to. she isnt the type whos obsessed with fame and all. once i heard or read, she was offered a movie or a soap but she refused. i think she started out as a model before landing on hosting. and i have to say, she is one of the best people around in showbiz. she doesnt blog about her showbiz life. she blogs more about beautiful things that inspires her or interests her. what actually attracted me to her blog are the things that we both aspire in life; how we both wanna help, travelling and the things we wanna do. her recent post about angie kinda surprised me, really. angie's also one of the people i look up to. how cool is that. its just a blissful thing for me. heeez. ouh well. since young, i have so many dreams but none of that, have i fulfilled. besides my folks being tight about me doing certain things ive always wanted to do, there are certain things i lack of. but its not gonna stop me from fulfilling those dreams. and i actually plan to when im all independent. for now, i can only contribute in a small amount but i know that small thing is already a big one.

'if we all do a little, we can do a lot.'

eye opener

hello. emmm, i dont really know how to begin. well, after this early mornings discovery of something which i actually put on hold til this evening, it made me reflect on things more serious than ever before, the things ive been doing, things i wanna do and the world. maybe some of you may have already known about this but ouh well, i just got to find out about it early this morning. i came across danna's friendster profile and saw a "youtube video" comment. i never usually watch youtube vids on peoples profiles but somehow, this particular vid made me. i watched the first few seconds of the vid and the words i saw, "hell or heaven", "...but something happened in 1977 that brought a dramatic change in the life of dr rawlings [a scientist]..." this gave me goosebumps and since it was already around 4-5am, i decided to watch it today so i wouldnt get scared. well, i had forgotten about it the whole day til around 8+ in the evening and i decided to watch it since i was eager to know what it contains. its nothing horrific like ghosts and all. and this isnt just for the christians at all. this is for all. the vid i posted isnt the same as the one i watched, i chose this vid cuz its more precise. just watch it.




now, correct me if im wrong, we all know that scientists dont believe in God and have doubts about the existence of a deity or similar supernatural and religious claims. and i dont know how many of yall will believe this and its up to you. i just wanted to share it because i felt i had to. like i said, i was never interested watching peoples vids or vid-comments but im sure and i know HE made me watch that vid for a reason. now i may be wrong, overreacting, exaggerating or whatever ya call it for those who arent so religious or who just dont believe but im just doing what i believe i should do. so yep. thank you. read this to learn more. http://www.av1611.org/hell.html
when i was younger, i had thoughts about hell being literally just under us, like how the inside of the earth is made of. well, we will really never know the truth til we all experience it ourselves right? but...

"blessed are those who have not seen, yet believe"

blank

so the many people celebrating berthdays thiz month! sheesh! wassep widdet!? lol.
belated happy berthday to marz, happy berthday to rv, advance happy berthday to the rest...too lazy to type your name. yarhh...like youre not used to hearing that, teehee.

anyways, i got sofa king borred that i decided i bake a cake. temptation oreo cheezcake . weemmy. teehee. dinn get 'nuff sleep last night. lerrr...stress nye aku. classes are gonna resume soon and im not looking forward to that. im too lazy to even think of school. im too lazy to even wake up in the morning but i force myself anyhow just so i could do something worthwhile. im too lazy to go out but i force myself just so i could show my face to the world once in awhile out there and not forever just in the world wide web. lol. whutteva te that. i dunno if im the laziest person in this world cuz im too lazy to even think of anything at all but i make the effort anyhow just so i could keep going. teehee, i think if my sluggishness continue, then i wouldnt be surprised if one day i were to be lazy to fall in love, roflmaol. wahh, just to think of that uh, ill get lazy to wake up, lazy to do anything, so all the time on the bed, smelling like sheyt...eeeeek! ahakz. but too bad! i smell like a baby! bluek! okaye larh. i really got nuthin better to type. i just wanted to type type type, dont care good or not. lalala. okaye, ill get back tuh mah game.

lets go dumb

this is why im hott

im hott kez im fly
ye aint kez ye nott

ye ticked off?
then knuck if you buck!